To Love Is To Sacrifice
by alicelightwoodbane
Summary: Post CoFA. After all, everything is back to normal: hunting demons, dating... But there is another enemy. And this time is different, because he knows their weakness: love. Mainly Malec, a bit of Clary/Jace, Izzy/Simon. Rated M for violence and possible lemons.
1. To Love Is To Cherish

**A/N: New story! ^^ The main idea of it came to me in dream. Seriously, I woke up with pounding heart, beacuse it's was so disturbing and anxious and I just had to write about it. It will be multi-chaptered, but not too many - I'm thinking 15? We'll see, it's still far from ending. Generally, it is set after CoFA (maybe except this whole thing with Sebastian/Johnatan :D), I mean we all know where our characters are in their relationships etc. They got back to New York and old business, they're still demon slayers. A lot of Alec/Magnus (because I simply love them), a little bit of Clary/Jace and Isabelle/Simon. What can I say? They will have to fight for their love, beacuse, as Valentine told us, _to love is to destroy_. Love is dangerous. And it is all about love, always. **

**Also, I'm going to create little 'soundtrack' for this story. One song for one chapter. I think it will conjure the mood and it'll be like peeking into character's brains (:D), especially their internal thoughts.  
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**Disclaimer: Of course, I do not own The Mortal Instruments. Wonderful Cassie Clare is the Creator.**

**Chapter 1: To Love is To Cherish**

**Song for this chapter: Never Let Me Go by Florence and the Machine**

Alec stepped into the shower in his bathroom at the Institute. He sighed in content, when hot water flowed down his neck, back, down. Maybe it wasn't very difficult fight, but surely it was exhausting. Anyway, his muscles still hurt as hell, after long pursuit of demons' horde. That was their tactic: to run away. Cleary, it was poor, since after clash with Shadowhunters they transferred into another dimension, defeated. Of course, a few scratches and mud on all body weren't avoided. Alec, with slight smile, traced his finger over barely visible scar on his collarbone - remains of recently sustained wound, which Magnus had healed. His boyfriend. How he loved this word. Magnus had recently had weird custom to appear always in that moment when they set off to hunting. Sure, it was overprotective, but it was also nice - to have someone behind your back. Alec always protected Jace and Izzy, and now also Clary. During action, unpleasant tingling always accompanied him- reminding him that in any moment someone or something could attack his back. Now the tingling was over, and if it did show up, it was always an effect of having Magnus' eyes on his nape. Well then, the warlock always was nearby: when they sustained any injuries; also he always ran toward Alec at first, to check on him if everything was alright. At the beginning, it was a little bit embarrassing- in the presence of the rest of Shadowhunters (especially Jace), and through that it was also annoying. But Alec was slowly getting rid of this feeling. He knew that Magnus did it because he cared. And the warlock always was dying of anxiety, when he wasn't around Alec during fight. Once he explained it in such words, "I will never, ever be ready to lose you. But if I will have to – and I know I will – then it will be because of your old age. Absolutely necessary. Not any other way." That's why Alec allowed him to do it. For Magnus it was entirely new thing too – dating a Shadowhunter. Probably the warlock wasn't used to live in continuous tension – and if Alec condemned him to such life, he wanted to ease it somehow.

He sped up a little his process of washing, when he had remembered Jace's ugly wound. His parabatai, being himself, of course must have risked everything, exposed himself to danger (unnecessarily). It ended with torn thigh – the cut wasn't deep, but it looked hideous. Not until had Magnus assured him that he would take care of Jace, having sent Alec comforting smile; not until had he seen that Magnus was getting down to work, he left the library, to wash away dirt and tiredness. He had absolute certainty that Jace would be fine – he had left him in good hands – and yet he wanted to check on his parabatai as soon as it was possible. Being a partner was extremely strong bond – Alec couldn't be calm until he would see fresh pink scar in a place where only a while ago the blood was gushing.

Alec quickly stepped outside the shower, dried himself and shook himself off like a wet dog. Tiny little drops from his hair landed on a mirror. In a hurry, he reached for the first clothing he found – washed out jeans and long sleeve navy shirt – and he got dressed. He raked his fingers through his wet hair and left it to dry by itself. He grabbed his stele and cellphone and set off downstairs, barefoot.

He found everybody in the library: Magnus, Jace and Izzy, except Clary. She must have left only a moments ago (after making sure that Jace was okay) – the smell of her perfumes, which irritated Alec's nose, still wafted in the air.

Jace was laying on a couch, without his trousers, only in his boxers. There was a blood-stained towel next to him. His wound, however, was clean. Isabelle was nearby. Magnus was sitting deeply sunken into a chair, with his legs outstretched. His eyes was closed and there were dark shadows under them.

Alec, having casted a glance at Jace and seen a look of self-contentment on his face (at least he wasn't in pain), moved toward his boyfriend. Magnus, hearing his footsteps, opened one eye, but then he closed it back immediately. Alec gently put his hand on Magnus' shoulder.

"Baby? Are you OK?" he asked quietly.

Corners of Magnus' mouth raised a little bit, though he kept his eyes closed.

"Yep. Just run ragged."

Alec sank to his knees and took Magnus' hands in his own. "You wanna take some of my strength?" He knew that there was no point in arguing: _Magnus, you don't have to do this; Magnus, stop doing us favours… _Because Magnus always had one, indisputable answer: _I love you. _

Magnus finally opened his eyes. He looked down on Alec and their intertwined hands. "No, sweetheart. I'll be fine. Just give me a minute."

Alec kissed warlock's knuckles. "You don't have to rush. We have plenty of time."

Smiling, Magnus bent down and their lips met in sweet, delicate kiss.

"Yuk. Get a room, you two," Jace, who reminded silent during the whole conversation, snorted in the end.

Alec jerked his head back, tearing away from Magnus for a while and he muttered, "Shut up," before he returned to kissing. Light flush spread across his neck.

Isabelle laughed quietly at his answer. She was sitting on a floor, with her knees pulled up under her chin, her back leaning against the couch occupied by Jace. She was the only one who didn't need a shower after recent fight – she looked fantastic, as always.

Alec raked his fingers through Magnus' hair and he felt lumps of mud in it. Poor Magnus, he didn't even have time to tidy himself up. Finally Alec broke the kiss, and half-satisfied, half-ashamed he discovered that Magnus was breathing heavily. He let himself examine warlock's face closer: there were two sooty streaks on his high cheekbones – he looked like brave American Indian. His lower lip was cut, but Alec couldn't vouch this one wasn't his prank. Definitely, being a Shadowhunter was dirty business. But even in such state Magnus was beautiful. Alec had to admit – this messy look was kind of… sexy.

Under Alec's inquiring gaze, Magnus groaned miserable. "I know, I look terrible." He disentangled himself from Alec's arms and stood up, before Alec could protest. Right after that he stopped and pressed his fingers to his temples. He felt dizzy. "God. I have no idea what kind of demon poison it was, but it was strong." Alec offered Magnus his hand for support, with look of concern on his face. "I hate being so drained."

"Jace. Move," Alec commanded.

"What?" blond boy asked, confused.

Meanwhile, Izzy stood up and knocked down his legs, making him assume a sitting position.

"Hey!" Jace tried to protest.

"Here, Magnus. Have a seat," Isabelle said sweetly and Alec sent her graceful smile. Magnus made a face – he didn't like the idea of sitting with Jace on the same couch, nonetheless he dropped onto the pillows. When he felt how soft there were, he sighed in pleasure. Alec smiled and then he pushed Isabelle between this two.

"Keep an eye on them, so they don't kill each other. I'll be right back. I'll bring something to eat."

In the doorway he almost collided with breathless Clary.

"Did you hear that?" she asked.

"What?" Jace stood up immediately, alarmed by tone of her voice. He pulled his pants on and came up to Clary, his brows frowned.

Izzy straightened up, ready for fight. Magnus tightened his shoulders, Alec stood frozen.

"You mean those faint buzzing?" Magnus asked, after a while of just glaring at each other. "I thought it was only in my head."

The hearing of Shadowhunters, even improved by runes, was nothing compared to warlock's sense.

Alec kneeled and put his ear to the floor, one hand put flat as if he was investigating invisible tracks. He looked like Aragorn while he chased orks, who had kidnaped Merry and Pippin.

Finally, he got up. "The floor is vibrating," he announced. "Something is coming."

They were at the Institute, on consecrated ground, so they didn't have to be afraid of demons, did they? However, it was hard to imagine something different. Something far more dangerous.

**I'm still not sure about this. Should I continue? Yes? No? God, please, no? xD Review! :)**


	2. To Love Is To Reveal Weak Point

**A/N: Wow! First of all, thank you thank you thank you for all reviews! They literally keep me writing. So, here is chapter 2! Ah, and sorry for my English. It isn't my native language, so be understanding, please.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own TMI. **

**Chapter 2: To Love is To Reveal Weak Point**

**Song: This Night by Black Lab  
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The Shadowhunters couldn't afford to stay in shock. Everybody ran to the weapons room: Jace for his swords, Alec for his bow and arrows, Clary and Isabelle for daggers (Isabelle's whip had already been rolled onto her wrist). Together with Magnus they rode the elevator down, during this applying fresh runes. Alec snorted, when Magnus conjured up new shoes for him – oh yeah, he totally had forgotten about it. They piled off the elevator and stood in front of enormous door, assuming offensive positions, ready to attack. There, downstairs, the noise was more distinct: crunching of gravel, clattering of iron, the cacophony of sounds – as if there was a whole army in front of the Institute.

Alec, without tearing his eyes away from the door, reached his hand. Magus took it and their fingers locked for a moment; he felt encouraging squeeze and then the heat was gone. From the corner of his eye, he noticed that Magnus had already started to create blue flames – to prepare for the battle. He had just enough time to reach into his quiver and put an arrow on a bowstring, when the door started opening slightly. On the doorstep there was hooded figure, who was wearing a cape. The setting sun behind his back gave the material a colour of blood. The stranger put his hand down, which had been on the doorknob only a second ago. And suddenly the realization hit them with force. This enemy had to be a Shadowhunter – that was the blood of Nephilim which let him in. Alec's hand trembled. The worst crime was to kill another Shadowhunter. A brother in blood.

"Who are you?" Alec asked, trying to sound confidently.

The figure smiled under the hood. That was all they could see – the eyes was still hidden in shadow.

"You can call me V." That voice definitely belonged to man – it was deep and clear.

Magnus snorted humorlessly. "Are you serious? And this," Magnus spread his arms, "is some kind of vendetta?"

Bane could see something which was still unnoticed by his companions – the whole crowd of Downworlders: werewolves, vampires and warlocks – besieging Institute's lawn. That really was the army.

V. jerked his head in surprise. As if he didn't expect Downworlder here. But right after he controlled himself, and ominous grin appeared on his face again.

"Actually, it is," he responded, this time something dark inside is tone.

"What do you want?" asked Jace. As always, he sounded arrogant.

"I have a proposal. To… exchange."

Jace raised his brow in contempt and Isabelle snorted, "Let's make it clear. You are a Shadowhunter, right? And you are taking up arms against us?"

V. ignored her. He clapped and white envelopes appeared in their hands – everyone's, except Isabelle.

"You have 24 hours to decide," V. said and then he disappeared in a cloud of dark blue smoke.

Alec finally let his breath. He felt rough paper in his fingers. He looked around - everybody was confused, so he looked at the thing is his hand at last.

The envelope was middle sized and it looked completely ordinary. Innocent, even. Alec didn't even manage to turn it over, when he heard a rustle. Jace, Clary and Magnus was already reading their messages. Izzy was staring blankly at her empty hands.

At first, he saw Jace's face.

_How about Clary? Your redhead. Give me her, and the rest of you will be safe…_

Without hesitation he tore open the envelope.

_The High Warlock of Brooklyn._

His face hardened. He raised his eyes again. He noticed the same expression of determination on Jace's face, even on Clary's – mixed with fear. However, the most important face he had left for last. Magnus…

_Dirty little Alexander._

_ PS You wasn't supposed to be here. But since you are… Let's play my evil game together._

Magnus looked devastated. Alec was about to come up to him, when Izzy spoke, "What on Angel was that?"

It was then, when they came to realization that Isabelle wasn't holding anything in her hands.

"I haven't received any letter." She sounded almost… hurt. "I haven't received any letter."

Suddenly, she started sobbing quietly.

Is it better to have somebody to care about or do not have to worry because there isn't anyone?

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><p>After Isabelle's little, unexpected attack, they moved to the library. They had to establish the facts, make up a plan of action. Alec sit down on the couch, next to his sister who was still sobbing quietly. He held her by the hand, trying to comfort her somehow. He wanted Magnus to hold his other hand , he wanted to have him at his side, as assurance that everything would be alright. But since the Institute's door closed, the warlock had been behaving strangely. Now he was standing in the far corner of the library, staring out the window, his forehead rested against cold glass. He was silent all the time.<p>

Jace decided to take over command. First, they showed each other the letters. Alec still flinched when he read his. He didn't even take into consideration to meet those conditions. Magnus threw his letter on a table only, and with inscrutable facial expression he got back to his corner. It turned out quickly that V. wasn't going to spare anybody's life (maybe except Izzy), since he demanded everyone from everybody. But in such case, what did he plan to do? To kill everybody? Was it some sort of game? He wanted to force them to give up people who they loved the most – at the beginning, and then they would die anyway? Not that they intended to accept his 'proposal'. They came to the library to discuss the plan of offense.

"We will fight together, shoulder to shoulder, right?" Jace said at the end, and everybody nodded, except Magnus, who was still standing by the window and he didn't even seem to listen. "Okay. So since it could be our last 24 hours on that world, I suggest we should spend them with our beloved." He clasped Clary to his side. "Go Alec, go to Magnus'." Parabatai exchanged smiles and Alec stood up. Isabelle remained seated. "Get up, Izz. Go to see Simon." Jace tried to sound like it wasn't a big deal.

Izzy looked at him with wide, gleaming eyes and she nodded slowly.

Magnus accepted Alec's hand, his eyes fixed straight ahead. Only his slightly furrowed brow showed that he was thinking intensively about something.

Together, in silence, they had left the Institute, and in the mists of the night they headed to Brooklyn.

**Yeah, I know, you are probably confused. But that's the point! ^^ You'll find out more about V. soon. All I can say: this V. is nothing like V from _V for Vendetta. _He is more like... Viserys Targaryen (_A Song of Ice and Fire_). Same cruelty. Same evil. Same insanity. ****That's why I called him V., I think. I don't know, maybe I did it unconsciously. ****:D **

**I can't promise regular updates. Now I have tons of studying (A-levels o_O) and probably I shouldn't even sit here. But. I can't live without fanfiction :D I'm addicted. I'm also addicted to your reviews! ;) So, right now, click this pretty little button and tell me what you think :D Any guesses what's V.'s problem? One last thing: more reviews = faster updates :) (Anyway, I'll try).  
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	3. To Love Is To Be Weak

**A/N: As always, thanks for reviewing! Here comes some angst. Don't hate me!** **Sometimes we just need to be reminded that love is powerful. And nobody can change that. Magnus Bane can't forget about it. (Sorry, I've just read last chapter of _Unstoppable _by xxlifeinwordsxx - if you didn't read it, do it now! I'm serious, NOW! So, I've read it, and this story always makes me cry and smile at the same time, and it touched me so deeply that I'm sitting and updating this, while listening _Rue's Whistle _from _The Hunger Games _and I feel like crying again. OK, it doesn't make any sense.) **

**Chapter 3: To Love is To Be Weak **

**Song: Goodbye My Lover by James Blunt (Ouch. This song hurts so much. I'm giving you a piece of my shitty soul right now. You can throw it away, if you don't want it, I'm used to it.)**

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><p>Magnus didn't say a word through the whole way. Something was clearly going on, but he didn't seem like he wanted to share his thoughts. So Alec reminded silent all the time.<p>

The night was cold. Normally, Alec would be grateful to have Magnus at his side – the warlock always was unnaturally warm, but tonight his closed attitude made him as cold as the air around them. When Alec removed his hand from Magnus' to hug himself as if it could help to keep warmth, Magnus didn't even flinch. He didn't send him any questioning look, didn't embrace him. He just walked straight ahead, without looking at Alec. The frown had disappeared, as if he had finally made a decision, which he had been wrestling earlier. At the sight of this new Magnus, big hard bump of fear started to create in Alec's throat. Just additional thing which didn't let him break the silence. Tightness in his chest warned him about something inevitable. It would be a long night…

When they finally got to Magnus' apartment and Alec bent down to take off his shoes, Magnus at last spoke, to his boyfriend's astonishment. "Alec. I think you should go." He was speaking so quietly that Alec barely heard him. But this sentence he understood perfectly.

"Oh?"

Magnus was staring at his feet. If he was breaking up with him, why didn't he have balls to say it straight into his eyes? Alec deserved at least this. He wanted to see Magnus' face when Magnus would tell him he doesn't love him anymore. But on the other hand, maybe Alec just overreacted? But under uncertain tomorrow… it just sounded so definitive.

"Are you… are you breaking up with me?" Alec asked, stuttering, although he knew the answer.

He couldn't wait until Magnus finally would speak, because tears already built up in his eyes. He turned on his heel and left, before he let them fall. Anyway, he wouldn't bear the answer.

* * *

><p><em>No no no no no no no no. What have I just done? <em>Magnus thought as he rested his head against the door, which had closed after Alec only seconds ago.

Alec believed him so easily. As if all these earlier assurances of love didn't matter. Just one fucking sentence did it. One indirect sentence, and his facial expression. God, he had to be wonderful actor. But this boy always was so self-conscious in the matter of love, so insecure, as if he couldn't believe Magnus really loved him.

But he did it for Alec's good. He just couldn't let Alec risk life of his family and his own for him, Magnus. He couldn't require him to choose, because he knew exactly that Alec would never let him go. He was too… good. To brave. And Magnus even 'wasn't supposed to be there'… What the fuck did it mean? Of course he wasn't going to leave Nephilim on their own. He was going to come there and stand between them. He was going to surrender to V., if it would be necessary. And then he was going to try to kill him.

Was it bravery or cowardice? Sacrifice or escape?

He had 800 years to learn the art of love. And he thought he did. But when it came to that boy… The only thing he knew was that he didn't want to see Alec wounded. And there he was: hurting Alec by himself.

But if he wasn't there, Alec wouldn't have to choose. Maybe he wouldn't even be in danger.

He did the right thing.

So why did it hurt so fucking much?

He already missed him.

He hurt him.

He saw his tears. And he was cause of said tears.

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><p>After unknown time of moping, his cellphone started ringing. Magnus realized he was seating on the floor, his back resting against the door. Still in the same place. The sky was still dark outside. The cellphone stubbornly didn't want to stop ringing. Magnus had to lift his hips a little to take it out of his back pocket.<p>

It was a few minutes past midnight. And it was Isabelle.

He pressed the green-receiver button and he didn't even have enough time to speak when he heard Izzy's yell, "What have you done to him?"

"Isabelle." His voice sounded weak, so he tried to clear his throat.

"You fucking bastard! He came home all in tears and I've never, ever seen him in such state! Even after Max's death! But when I tried to ask him what's wrong, he started sobbing harder, if it's even possible and he ran away. And I have no fucking idea where he is. So, what have you done? Did you break up with him?"

"Yes."

He heard Isabelle's gasp. Probably she had expected denial. But he was tired. And miserable, too.

"You coward! Do you think he would leave you? You let this sick V. manipulate you? You believe him? Alec would fight for you! He loved you, phh, he probably still loves you! Maybe he is stupid, but he is also loyal."

"I know," he said through gritted teeth. "That's why I did it."

"What?"

He didn't want to turn out to be weak. But when Isabelle was shouting at him and she spelled out what he had really done, it sounded… pathetic. He had to, he just had to tell somebody the truth. That he wasn't heartless, immortal beast.

"I wanted to protect him. In my own, twisted way," he was speaking in resigned voice. "I know, probably it isn't any excuse…"

"Sure it isn't! You should fight next to him, not leave him and let him believe that you don't want him!"

"I love him more than life."

"Now I know." Isabelle's voice softened. "Make sure that he knows it too."

"Isabelle…" It won't be easy. He hurt Alec…

"Magnus. I'm sorry I called you a bastard. And a coward. But don't give me reasons for repeat it."

Then she hung up.

Magnus let his phone slip out of his hand. It hit the floor with dull tap. Magnus sighed heavily and felt hot tears running down his cheeks.

_I'm so hollow._

This conversation made him aware that he had no idea how protect Alec. That he was too weak to protect him. Too weak to stay away from him.

When he trembled with another sob, his cellphone started ringing again.

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><p><strong>Just to be clear: Izzy was with Simon, but she didn't stay overnight *wink wink* She retured to the Institue, and then ran into our devastated Alec.<strong>

**Review?  
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	4. To Love Is To Have a Weapon

**Okay, they may be a little bit OCC in this chapter. But remember, they can die tommorow. There is no time to be shy ;) And, uhm, this fic is rated M, right? I warned you :P Annnd, the usual: thanks for reviews, alerts and favs ;3 **

**Disclaimer: I do not own TMI. It owns me :D**

**Chapter 4: To Love Is To Have a Weapon**

**Song: Weapon by Matthew Good Band (I highly suggest you listen to it. It's perfect.)**

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><p>ˮMa-Magnus?"<p>

That voice. Alec sounded so… broken. So vulnerable.

"Alexander." Magnus got up from the floor. He heard Alec letting go his breath in relief, as if he had been afraid of rejection.

"Izzy told me what you told her."

"Alec…"

The Shadowhunter cut him off desperately, "Do you still love me?"

"Of course." There was no hesitation. How could he doubt? Oh yeah, Magnus broke up with him.

Silence. And then, "Can I come in?"

"Sure. Where are you?"

Instead of the answer, he heard click of opened lock.

Alec stood in the doorway, his shoulders and head lowered. His eyes hidden behind hair. Slowly he put his hand down, this one which held a cellphone, and he looked at Magnus timidly. "I'm here".

They just stood and gazed at each other in silence. It was like they saw each other for the very first time again. Magnus' vision was blurred. Was he crying again? Finally, he spoke, "Were you here all the time?"

Alec blushed even harder, if it's possible. "I'm sorry. I wanted-I wanted to be with you tonight." He swallowed, not without trouble. "It was the only possible way, wasn't it?" He shifted uncomfortably and added in whisper, "I'm pathetic."

"No." Magnus couldn't listen to it any longer. "No, Alec. I'm the one who should apologize." Speaking, he moved closer to the boy, so they were standing only few inches apart. When Alec finally raised his head, his hair tickled Magnus' chin. "Alec, I-"

"Shush," Alec cut him off, again, this time with brief kiss.

"Wait." When Magnus saw Alec's hurt face, he added quickly, "I want to say it. I need to." He trailed off for a moment, as if he expected protest. Nothing. "I love you."

"I'm sorry, Magnus, but I don't want to hear it now, "Alec said, mischievous grin appearing on his face. "Now I want to feel it." Magnus looked at him with disbelief. "Love me, Downworlder."

Oh, Magnus couldn't resist it. He captured Alec's lips with hunger, and the Shadowhunter responded with the same force. They didn't have time to be gentle, cautious. Not tonight. They needed each other now, in this moment. Lust was burning their skin, so they had to get rid of their clothes. Alec lifted his arms and grinned widely, when Magnus rolled up his shirt. It was wonderful sensation – to feel warlock's chilly fingers on his naked torso, running through his hardened nipples. It was almost too much. So, he led Magnus to the bedroom, closing the door behind them with a kick. Magnus pinned Alec to the wall, and Alec didn't mind being manhandled. He almost smiled again, but grimace froze on his lips and changed into moan, when Magnus started working his knee between Alec's legs. He rubbed Alec's groin, and the Shadowhunter was seized with this feeling again – that there was too much clothing between them. He reached for Magnus' pants, but only managed to unbutton them and undo the fly, when Magnus immobilized his wrists, turned them and threw Alec onto bed. Black hair of boy split over yellow comforter. He smiled lazily and for Magnus it was one of the most beautiful view in the world – of course, apart from that moment when Alec's face distorted in pleasure while he came, or when he tried to be solemn while saying 'I love you' but light sparkles in his eyes always betrayed all his emotions. He was simply beautiful.

Magnus climbed on him and nuzzled his neck. Alec smelled like salt: sweat and tears. It was overwhelming scent, so sensual, so natural, so Alec. He was dying to taste it. He took Alec's ear lobe between his teeth, licked it, and pulled lightly. The Shadowhunter groaned beneath him and clutched his arm. He bucked his hips impatiently, and Magnus met him halfway, their erections rubbed against each other, sill clothed.

"Magnus…," Alec moaned breathlessly. There was plea behind this simple word.

OK, so Alec was going to get his blowjob. Magnus actually wasn't planning to have sex tonight. The next day they had important confrontation, maybe even battle. Of course, he didn't worry about himself, but Alec should be refresh and rested. And it was already late. When Magnus got rid of Alec's pants and let Alec do the same with his own, he reached for Alec's hard, aching penis, but the boy stopped him.

"No."

What?

"What?"

Alec almost chuckled at Magnus' confusion, although he was begging for release.

"I need you right now." Magnus' eyes widened. Alec added with purr, "Fuck me."

Ooooh, it was so hot. But Magnus had had his objections, hadn't he? How had they sounded…? Ah, yes, "Are you sure? You have to be strong for tomorrow."

Alec rolled his eyes and snorted. Then he lifted his arm to Magnus' eyes. "Do you see that?"

There was permanent mark on his pale skin. Magnus recognized it, and he smiled. Stamina rune.

"I can take good pounding into my ass, and still be fine."

Oh my God, where had his shy, innocent Alec gone? But this new Alec was hot. Irresistible. And yet, still a little bit self-conscious, because he lowered his eyes and put on serious look. "I'll be okay, I promise."

Magnus smirked. Demented elf. "Oh, I know it. I'll take care of you."

It sounded ambiguously, and Alec smirked, mirroring Magnus' facial expression. He started to roll over. When Magnus' cock rubbed against his buttocks, he lifted his hips a little, encouragingly, invitingly. He turned his head a little and looked at Magnus over his shoulder, from under his eyelashes. "Is this OK?" he asked innocently, and rolled his hips. When he felt Magnus' penis twitched, he arched his back in pleasure. He would have never had enough of this sensation.

Magnus was speechless. They weren't used to such position – usually Alec laid on his back, with Magnus hovering above him.

Alec could see Magnus' astonishment perfectly, so he decided to encourage his boyfriend. He reached for Magnus'shoulder and pulled him down gently, so warlock's chest was now pressed against Alec's back. Now he could feel very well how quick was Magnus' breath. Hot skin of his abdomen was rubbing against small of Alec's back. Alec rocked them gently. He turned his head a little to whisper in Magnus' ear, "Fuck me, _please_."

Those words had a magical effect. Magnus roused himself and dug into Alec's lips. The Shadowhunter gasped in surprise or excitement.

When Magnus finally entered him, Alec couldn't catch his breath. He grabbed fistfuls of sheets and bit his lip to stop himself from screaming. But it would be cry of pure pleasure. Instead of it, he let himself moan – the deep, long-drown-out moan, which caused Magnus move inside him.

"Harder, Magnus. Harder."

"Mmmmmmalec…"

"Oh, God, Magnus…"

Breath. Breath. Breath.

Creaking of bedsprings.

Moan.

"Ah. Angel… My Angel…"

In response, Alec reached backwards to wrap Magnus' neck, with the same arm, which the stamina rune was on. As if he subconsciously wanted to emphasize what he was going to say, "You are my strength."

Suddenly, Magnus withdrew, and Alec hissed in pain and disappointment. He hadn't even had enough time to protest, when Magnus grabbed his thighs and rolled him over.

"I want to see your face."

Then he was back again.

"Mmm. Don't you dare ever leave me again," Alec panted out.

Magnus rested his forehead against Alec's shoulder, starting to lose his rhythm in overwhelming climax. "We will be together until death tears us apart."

And it could be tomorrow.

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><p><strong>Um. So, how was that? Do you like it? Hate it? Please, review, beacuse I still feel insecure about smutty stuff. <strong>

**Love you all! xoxo**


	5. To Love Is To Erect a Barricade

**A/N: Hello, my lovely readers! How are you? ^^ It's been a while, I know. So, now, read and enjoy :)**

**Disclaimer: The usual. I don't own TMI. **

**Chapter 5: To Love is To Erect a Barricade**

**Song: Barricades by Fyfe Dangerfield (Love it. You should really listen to it. :3) **

Alec woke up when something had tickled his cheek. It was silky and smelled familiar. Magnus' hair. He smiled and opened his eyes. Only inches from his nose there was Magnus' face. In the light of the sun (which was alarmingly high on the sky already), his skin seemed to shine like gold. His face was soft, every signs of his 800 years had disappeared. He looked like impish teenager at last. His eyelids, devoid of any make-up, were lilac-colored; long, dark lashes cast a shadow over his cheeks. His lips was slightly raised in the corners, they showed he was dreaming of something nice. He sighed quietly, when Alec's fingers brushed over his face, but he didn't wake up.

In this one moment, everything seemed ideal. Indestructible. Laying there, entangled in yellow, crumpled sheets, with his legs entwined in his beloved man's, Alec thought that nothing was able to take it away from him. He was undefeated, because he had the love of his life at his side. The love whose breath was caressing his arm, whose steady heart-beating was as integral part of his life as breathing; the love who just snored sweetly and wrinkled his nose.

Alec gently put away Magnus' arm, which was wrapped around his waist, and left brief kiss on the top of his head, careful not to wake him up. He got up and headed for the bathroom, still naked. When he came back, Magnus was sprawled across the whole bed – he immediately took up vacated room. His hand, which rested on Alec's side of bed, was clenched around sheets, and his brows were knit, as if the warlock knew subconsciously that something was wrong - someone was missing. Alec leant against the wall and smiled to himself. Pure beauty.

"Could you just stop staring at me while I'm sleeping?" the figure who was laying on the bed muttered into pillows, without changing his position.

Alec blushed, caught in the act, though he didn't turn his gaze.

"Seriously, Alec," Magnus said, rolling over. He opened one eye, and cast a glance at the Shadowhunter, who was standing naked in the middle of his bedroom. "I look unattractive. Unlike you."

Alec climbed onto the bed, sat with his legs crossed, and put a pillow onto his lap. He was staring at Magnus all the time. Finally, he lowered his eyes and said quietly, "You are the most perfect creature I've ever seen."

When Magnus hadn't answered, Alec looked at him at last. Magnus' cheeks was slightly flushed, he was smiling warmly, his smile reaching the corners of his eyes. God, he was breathtaking.

"I love you, you know that, right?" Magnus finally said, his smile even wider.

Alec grinned in response. "Yes, I know. And I love you."

Their good-morning kiss was sweet and long. For the umpteenth time, their tongues danced in perfect harmony.

At the end, Alec tore away from Magnus, to catch his breath. However, his arms was still wrapped around Magnus' neck.

"What time is it, by the way?" Alec asked, after a while.

"No idea. Noon?"

"Shit! We have to hurry up!" Alec sprang out of the bed, but Magnus stopped him, by catching his wrist.

"Relax, Shadowhunter." Alec sent him skeptical look. "We had 24 hours, remember?" The boy stiffened. Yes, he did remember. "So it's still about 6 left. Jace said, not that I listen him, that we were supposed to spend this time together, with the ones we love. It's the best we can do."

Alec slowed down a little. Magnus was right. They didn't even have to prepare for the battle. They were just always ready. He sighed. "I know. It's just… I want to be with them, too. I mean, they are my family, and I love them as I love you."

Magus nodded. "Of course. So let's have a shower, then breakfast, and we're heading for the Institute. How does it sound for you?" he said, getting up from the bed.

He didn't want to stop Alec, no. He didn't mean it. He just wanted to drive away a tension, which grew, as the time passed.

Alec stood, insecure, with his hands behind his back, and his head lowered. "Mind if I shower with you? I want to hold you just for a little bit longer."

Magnus laughed. God, how after all these wild nights, could this boy even ask? "Of course I don't mind, cutie. I highly desire your presence there."

Alec flushed, although he followed Magnus to the bathroom.

* * *

><p>After a few hot moments, with his cheeks reddened, mussed damp hair, although fully-clothed (Alec); with mischievous grin, fresh-glittered skin and waist wrapped by a towel (Magnus); the two entered the kitchen. Magnus got down preparing breakfast, with the kiss sending Alec message '<em>stay out of this.' <em>The boy almost obeyed, but instead of taking a seat at the table, he climbed on the kitchen counter, to feast his eye on bustling Magnus. With his legs swinging above the floor, he followed Magnus' every move with his eyes. The warlock was preparing coffee and pancakes, and form time to time he peeked at the Shadowhunter. Every time their eyes met, Alec was blushing and Magnus was smiling fleetingly. In a moment, however, the full smile wasn't leaving his face.

Maybe their mood that morning seemed weird, in the face of what was waiting for them – they should have been nervous, depressed, worried – whereas they were acting as if they were soaking into this one single moment. Everything else was supposed to come later, or maybe not at all. They have each other.

For example, Magnus usually made breakfast with his magic, but today they seemed to value and savor the time, which was given to them. This mundane acting let them discern the passage of time, the transience of the moment.

"Cup of coffee, darling?" Magnus murmured, handing Alec a steaming mug.

"Yes, please." Alec took it with gratitude. He took a large gulp and squinted his eyes, when warmth spilled out his chest. "Mmm…"

"Is it good?" Magnus asked playfully. This earlier sound was explicit, after all.

"Delicious," Alec responded, without opening his eyes.

Oh. This word in Alec's mouth was delicious.

"Can I kiss you" Magnus suddenly asked.

Alec chuckled. "Do you really need to ask?"

"Oh, I just didn't want you to spill your coffee on us, while I was planning to attack you with your eyes still closed."

Alec laughed, but the sound froze on his lips, when their lips finally met. He was glad he was sitting on the counter – it was support for his now weakened knees. And he could easily wrap his legs around Magnus' hips, to pull him closer. He caught his heels on the towel that wrapped Magnus' waist, and he started to slide it down Magnus' ass, when the warlock pulled back with a shout,

"Pancakes!"

Alec snorted with disbelief. Seriously? _Pancakes?_

"It is your fault!" Magnus was muttering to himself, bending over a pan, and trying to look like someone who knows what to do. His hair was falling on his shoulders, hiding half of his face. "You almost burned them!"

"Me?" Alec asked with amusement. "Am I that irresistible?"

Magnus turned to him. "You have no idea."

When Alec was about to think that Magnus was going to resume their broken kiss, which quickly had been turning into something much bigger, a plat with tower of pancakes appeared on the table, causing a twang.

"Eat, Shadowhunter."

Alec jumped down from the counter, and he winced.

"What's wrong?" Magnus asked immediately. Of course he noticed.

"Nothing." Under Magnus' disbelief look, he added, "My ass hurts."

Magnus almost chuckled. "Should I be sorry?"

Alec laughed. "No! No. I actually like this feeling." He got embarrassed. "I mean, I'm not a masochist, I don't enjoy the pain. But it's like a tangible proof of you inside me. Same as you coming inside me. It's my favorite part."

Alec was talking about it so easily (well, of course the blush was present, but it was standard), even with small dreamily smile playing on his lips. Magnus was on cloud nine. And turned on. But Alec said, as if he read Magnus' mind, "Don't think about it." He jokingly wagged his finger at Magnus. "Because I wouldn't be able to say 'no' to you, but it's late. We should really go now."

Magnus sighed theatrically. "I know. Eat, and I'll get dressed."

Alec rolled his eyes as if he wanted to say: _It's going to last forever. _

Magnus got up. Leaving, he threw over his shoulder, "Don't give me that look. I'm going to look fabulous, no matter what."

* * *

><p>In the Institute hall, Isabelle was already waiting for them. When they got out of the elevator, holding hands, she looked up from her cellphone and smiled.<p>

"Oh, hey. You're early."

` Magnus just shrugged. Their time was almost over. Alec sent him meaningful glance, when Izzy looked down, to text anther message. He wanted to speak to her in private. Magnus understood, left quick peck on Alec's cheek, and headed deep into the hallway, to the weapons room.

Alec placed his hand on the back of his neck, waiting for Isabelle to look at him – she was still typing furiously.

"How are you doing?" he asked finally.

She raised her eyes at him. "What exactly are you asking?"

"Oh, c'mon. V… He wasn't right. You are not… without love." Alec didn't know how to say it.

"I know," she cut him off. "He wanted to piss me off. He tried to make me believe I'm heartless bitch." Her eyes darkened. "And almost succeed."

"Almost? Does it mean that you…?"

"Yep. I was with Simon last night." She grinned at him, seeing how uncomfortable it was for Alec – talking about this stuff with his baby sister. Then she became serious again. "I told him I loved him."

Alec's facial expression didn't change. Maybe it softened a little. He didn't start laughing, didn't look shocked. He said only, "That's good for you."

Izzy smiled weakly. "It was surprisingly nice – to say it. And really mean it." She tapped her cellphone with red nail. "He texted to me those three word just a moment ago. I feel like little naïve girl, and it's silly, but it looks so pretty on my cellphone. Do you wanna see?" she asked, knowing exactly what Alec's reaction would be.

"No! No, thanks."

She laughed, and Alec hugged her close. With her head on his shoulder, she asked, "And you?"

Alec pulled back, and he saw a sly smile on her face.

"Seeing how funny you walk, I'm assuming everything went right yesterday?"

Alec blushed and smacked her shoulder lightly. "Izzy!"

"You don't have to thank me, little brother."

"I'm not your little brother," he responded, faking sulk.

"Yes, you are. And I love you."

Alec smiled warmly, still flushed. "I love you, too." He kissed her forehead, and in this gesture there was whole typical protectiveness of elder brothers.

They entered the weapons room together. Clary and Jace were there already, in typical Shadowhunter gear – black and leather. Clary was seating on a table, and playing nervously with a dagger, wiggling her fingers. Jace was busy with choosing blades, with his head bent and hair covering his eyes. Magnus was standing nearby, leaning against the wall. He immediately came up to Alec, as soon as he had appeared right behind Isabelle.

The atmosphere was clearly tense, more than before usual hunting. This time their enemy was stronger.

"How are your spirits?" asked Jace, when he tucked another weapon into his belt.

Alec just shrugged, and Izzy said, "We're not planning to die, if that's what you're asking."

Jace raised the corners of his mouth, in poor imitation of smile. Then he turned to his parabatai. "We've already written to Maryse. Fire message. We told her we had… a situation, but," gold eyes met blue, in silent agreement, "we could handle it. We would call the Clave if things started to become… uglier."

Alec nodded. "There is no need to have more people here." _More people who love. And who are ready to sacrifice themselves in the name of love._

Jace cleared his throat. "OK, Lightwoods, go change. Meet us downstairs."

After those words, they parted.

* * *

><p>When the sun started to set, they knew it was time. They met in the hall, and together – four black figures and one ridiculously glittery – stepped out the Institute. Perhaps it was risky, but they couldn't commit murder on consecrated ground. Murder of one of them, a Shadowhunter.<p>

They stood in little semicircle, opposite a rusty gate. They looked defenseless in the middle of huge lawn. The wind was yanking their hairs, and Alec every now and then had to brush his locks away, to see anything. At last, he gave up, and lowered his hand, which was taken over by Magnus immediately. They exchanged weak smiles.

Finally, the gate creaked quietly. Everybody thought, _This is it, _and on the path…

… Simon appeared.

"What the hell, Daylighter?" Jace shouted, when a danger, which caused adrenaline rush, turned out… not to be a danger.

Simon grinned. He grinned!, and then he responded, "There are two people who are loved by me. I couldn't stay away." The vampire sent Clary warm glance, and the girl returned it, though she was a little bit confused.

Izzy covered her mouth with her hand. Was it the sun, which was playing in her eyes, or did Alec really saw tears there?

Simon finally turned to Izzy. "Did you really thing I would leave you?"

Jace stood with his jaw dropped. Probably he had never looked that startled.

Magnus muttered to himself, "He's better than me," but Alec only squeezed his hand, commanding him to shut up.

Izzy roused herself, and reached her hand. Simon took it without hesitation, and stood in makeshift semicircle.

As soon as they had reorganized their formation, Downworlders started to fill the lawn. Among them V. was walking – he looked like a king, so generous to stride among his lieges. Those of them, who were closest to him, considered themselves graced with permission to touch his robes. They were looking at him in with adoration, although some of that looks were… empty, faked, as if forced. Their faces were hardened in expression of… betrayal? Hate? Their emotions turned to the six standing in front of them.

V. stopped, so his retinue. He stepped out of a crowd, the wall of the faithful behind him.

"You are here," he spoke finally, as if he didn't believe what he was seeing. His voice was coming from under his hood. "That's not what I expected."

"What do you mean?" Isabelle asked, with barely concealed anger. Even though she couldn't see his eyes, somehow she felt his piercing gaze on herself.

"Girl. Loyalty definitely is not Lightwood's thing."

Alec clenched his teeth in rage. "How do you know?"

"I know your mother and your father, little Alexander. I saw them, betraying his master, Valentine. In one second, just to safe their lives. Theirs and their little sonny boy's."

Alec eyes widened. "You were a member of the Circle…"

Jace cut him off, "But it doesn't make any sense. Valentine hated Downworlders. And you… you bask in their adoration."

V. waved his hand. "I'm not here to talk. What is your decision?"

"Are you blind?" Jace blurted out. To emphasize his words, he grabbed Clary's hand possessively.

V. actually… laughed. "Same arrogance." He controlled himself. "Do you know what exactly was your father's undoing? Your real father, and the only father you knew?" He trailed off. "Love."

And then few things happened at the same time. A handful of Downworlders attacked them, without much enthusiasm. Alec let go of Magnus' hand, and lost sight of him for a moment. Somewhere somebody changed into a handful of salt, after attacking Simon, and the white powder dusted their hairs. Alec heard a whistle of Isabelle's whip, cutting the air. He shot an arrow, but couldn't manage to see what it hit, he only heard short cry.

After a while, everything went quiet.

V.'s crowd disappeared. And so did Magnus.

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><p><strong>Dadadadaaaaammmm. I'm evil... ^^ If you liked it - review! If you didn't like it - review! :D Just tell me your thoughts. It'll help in the future. More reviews = faster updates :)<strong>

**And Happy Easter! I'll have more free time now (for a while), so I'll write/read/eat/sleep/be lazy. No studying. Bleh. Ah, heaven. :D**


	6. To Love Is To Fear

**A/N: Hello! :) Thanks for reviews, alerts and favs! Love you all, people! Ah, and in this chapter when something is in those: 'yada yada', instead of those: "yada yada", it means those are character's thoughts.  
><strong>

**Disclaimer: Cassie owns them. **

**Chapter 6: To Love is To Fear**

**Song: I Will Follow You Into the Dark by Death Cab For Cutie. (Especially that line: "Fear is the heart of love". So true.)**

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><p>„<em>Mea culpa, mea maxima culpa.<em>

_I may not believe in sin, (…) but I do feel guilt. We Shadowhunters live by a code, and that code isn't flexible. Honor, fault, penance, those are real to us, and they have nothing to do with religion and everything to do with who we are. This is who I __**am**__, Clary. I'm the one of the Clave. It's in my blood and bones. So tell me, if you're so sure this wasn't my fault, why is it that the first thought in my mind when I saw Abbadon wasn't for my fellow warriors but for __**you**__? (…) all I could think about was you…"_

_City of Bones_

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><p>Alec was sitting on the steps in front of the Institute.<p>

It was late. The night was deep, the sky ominous purple. It looked like rain. Afternoon wind had got stronger. It was cold, but Alec felt nothing. Only torpor, in the place where his heart used to be.

He probably had gone through all possible phases:

At first, he had tried to keep calm…

"_Where's Magnus?" his voice quivered unwittingly. Maybe he had just run after some Downworlder, and in no time he would emerged from behind the trees? _

_No one answered him._

…then he had been yelling and thrashing around the yard, when everybody had been standing in a state of total stupefaction, not knowing what to do…

"_WHERE IS HE? Did anybody see what happened? What did they do to him?" His hands were trembling so hard that he broke an arrow that he didn't even know he was holding. _

"_Alec…" Isabelle finally spoke. "Maybe Magnus… followed V. voluntarily…?" she was speaking hesitantly, as if she was afraid of her brother's reaction. _

_She was right. "What do you mean?" his tone was rough. _

"_Remember when he said he wanted to protect you? Maybe… it is part of his plan. He surrendered to V., to save you…" 'He sacrificed himself.'_

_Alec shook his head. "No! No. We… talked about it." 'Well, we didn't exactly use words, but… there was no need. Unless I though there wasn't.' "He promised me he won't leave me…" 'No, not really.'_

…then he had fallen into a panic, when he had realized what exactly had happened, in whose hands Magnus was…

"_We have to find him! We have to…" Tears started running down his cheeks, against his will. _

"_It's okay, Alec…" Izzy tried to comfort him. _

"_Alec. Alec!" Jace's face was hard. "Of course we will find him. Spruce yourself up! You have to be strong."_

'_How…? Magnus was my strength… Is.'_

…then he felt wild determination, as they had finally decided what to do. He saw there were people around him, who was ready to help.

Jace, whose self-control kept Alec from falling apart.

Izzy, who knew best how much Alec loved Magnus.

Clary, tiny, frail Clary, who was going to have the biggest part in their plan of finding Magnus.

Even Simon, who barely knew what was going on.

But as time went by, he was struck down by doubts again. Now he felt hopelessness, seizing him slowly. With his trembling hands, he was trying to wipe the caked tracks of tears from his cheeks. He was trying to focus his gaze on Jace, who was pacing back and forth right in front of him. The blonde finally stopped.

"We will find him. You hear me? We will find him."

He was repeating those words as a mantra since some time. As if he was afraid that Alec would break down soon.

The blue-eyed looked up at him, and tried to nod. "I know," Alec finally managed to say. It came out as a whisper. "It's just… I'm scared. I'm terrified, Jace. I mean… what if… I think I would sense it… but… what if he's dead?"

Jace crouched down across from him, to look him in the eyes. He placed his hands on Alec's shoulders firmly. "Listen to me. Are you listening?" Alec nodded, again. He felt like a marionette. "Magnus is alive. We will find him."

At that very moment Clary was trying to improve the tracking rune. Alec had given her a ring, which belonged to Magnus, and with this one little thing they were going to find him. Now he could only wait. He still couldn't believe it – Magnus was the High Warlock of Brooklyn, how anybody managed to capture him?

This inactivity was killing him. He felt as if he was betraying Magnus – sitting like that, resigned, idly.

They went quiet again. Jace finally stopped walking, and just sat on the steps next to Alec. Close, so that his parabatai felt his presence. Support.

"I love him. I can't lose him. He is my life now," Alec spoke after a while, his voice raspy. He didn't know why he was speaking.

"Alec. Think rationally-"

But Alec cut Jace off. "How? I can't! Every time we hunt or fight and Magnus is next to me I can't focus on the enemy, because all I can think about is that somebody can hurt Magnus. All I can see is his thin frame. I know, there is nothing weak about him, but in lover's eyes everything is so fucking fragile, isn't it? I hate myself for it. I should protect you, be the responsible one, but all I can see is Magnus. I just wanted him to be safe. Is this so wrong?" He choked at his own words. "So don't you dare say: keep calm. I thought that you, from all the people, you would understand."

_I understand_, Jace wanted to say. '_All I could think about was you…' _But there was no words of consolation in such time.

During his speech, Alec had stood up. We was overcome by anger and… fear. Now he was trying to calm his breathing. Finally, he panted out, "Sorry."

Jace sighed. He looked supernatural in the moonlight. His golden hair seemed silver. "No, Alec. Don't apologize." He reminded silent, and then added, "V. surrounds himself with Downworlders. We don't know why, but he definitely doesn't kill them. They… they admire him. Magnus should be… safe."

Alec swallowed hardly. "It doesn't make me fear less."

Jace almost laughed. "Yeah, I know. But I promise you, I swear on the Angel, we will find him."

Alec looked at him attentively. "Thank you."

At this moment, Clary run out the Institute. "Alec! Alec, I know where he is."

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><p><strong>Sorry it was so short, but I wanted to show interactions between Jace and Alec - our beloved parabatai - in separte chapter. <strong>**Hope you enjoyed it! Review, pretty please? :)**


	7. To Love Is To Want Nothing in Return

**A/N: Hi! It's time to get to know V.'s story. Don't try to understand him. He's insane. We are here to prove him wrong. And, as always, thanks for reading :)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own TMI.**

** Chapter 7: To Love Is To Want Nothing in Return **

**Song: On My Side by Cory Chisel and The Wandering Sons. (It was difficult choice. This song is so... peaceful, despite the meaning, but I wanted to show that Magnus isn't afraid of death. I mean, he's expected it for centuries, maybe once he even wanted to die. But now, he just thought Alec would be at his side for him. Nobody wants to die alone.)**

* * *

><p>Magnus's eyes cracked open, when something sharp had cut his cheek. He felt burning pain, hot liquid flowed down his neck. Blood. Then he heard somebody murmured, "Such pretty face", and smacked his lips in disapproval.<p>

Magnus' vision sharpened, enough to let him see a figure in front of him.

V. for the first time had taken off his cape, so Magnus could have examined his appearance. The man had porcelain skin, interwoven with small thin scars. His hair was straight, chin-long, so light that almost silver. But the most amazing thing were his eyes – dark and fathomless, and when you were about to say they were black, you could see deep purple around his pupils. His mouth – pale, almost blue – was tighten into thin line.

Suddenly the face moved away, and Magnus had to fight wave of nausea. Too fast. What was going on with him?

"Finally you woke up," said V., coming up to a wooden table, which was standing in the other side of the room. Near it, there was big chair, upholstered in red plush.

Magnus tried to stand up, using that V. turned his back. Ignoring his sore muscles, he raised himself to his knees. When he jerked his arms, it turned out that he was handcuffed, put in chains, pinned to the wall.

V., without turning around, said, "Don't try anything. I have drained all of you energy – for a moment I even thought I overdid." Magnus could have sworn he heard a smile in V's voice. "You don't have enough strength to use your magic."

Ah, that's why he felt so… run ragged. He tried to focus, ready for an influx of warmth and familiar tickling in his fingertips. Nothing. V. was speaking the truth. It was hard to even keep his eyelids open (one of them swollen for sure), to focus his vision on the figure in front of him. It wasn't helping that V. was wearing a snow-white clothes, which were stinging Magnus' eyes. They contrasted with semi-darkness of the room.

Where was he anyway? The room was so big, that in current light he couldn't see its end. The walls and floors were bare – and cold, Magnus realized, after he had shivered. The only source of light was tiny window, almost at the ceiling. Under the window, there was this table, at which V. was now sitting. The table and the chair were the only furniture in this space. There was humidity in the air, the dripping of something in the corner could be heard. Water or… blood?

Magnus leaned against the wall heavily, because his knees started to give up. He tried to wipe the blood from his cheek, but as soon as he touched it, a sharp pain shot through him. He winced. V. noticed it, and made almost worried face.

"I'm sorry I have to do this to you. Dirty work isn't usually my domain." He arranged a pyramid of his fingers. "But if my… _friends, _found out what I am doing with their kinsman, they wouldn't be pleased."

V. had white gloves on his palms. He took them of with disgust, when he had noticed some bloodspots on them. He put them down on the table meticulously – next to a knife, scissors, daggers, a quill, a sword, an axe, and a syringe.

Fucking psychopath in fucking white gloves.

"Alec will find me." It was the first thing he managed to say, his voice hoarse.

What he didn't except, that V. would smile. He would have looked beautiful, if he hadn't looked so terrifying. "Oh, I hope so."

The sense of those words got through him in a milliseconds, despite his earlier problems with concentration. He was just damn bait? V. used him, he used that Alec loved Magnus, to lured the Shadowhunter.

"What do you want?"

V. became serious again. "Vendetta."

This word was full of such venom, that Magnus flinched.

"You want to know my story?" V. didn't wait for an answer. "But I warn you – it's long. And when you finally knew it, I will have to kill you." He smiled shortly. "Make yourself comfortable.

"So yes, your little friend was right. I was a member of the Circle. I joined it not because of Valentine's views or Valentine himself, but because of the power. I have to admit, Valentine had charisma, and it was that thing which hypnotized me at the beginning. But then I realized… that standing at his side, I can _rule_. At first, as his right hand, and then… Then it turned out every one of us thought the same, Valentine told everybody that we are irreplaceable. But I was not going to back out. The time of test came – the Upraising, and it turned out which one of us was truly loyal. Valentine was betrayed by his own wife, and even Valentine betrayed himself – running away and leaving his comrades. Not many of us stayed till the end, even the Lightwoods… It was turn for a punishment, and I was the one who received the strictest one. Death would be an act of grace – I was stripped off the Marks and banned from Idris. Why? Because I didn't love – I didn't have family, and because of it I was less precious. Look at the Lightwoods – they were saved by their tiny tot; only because they had a kid, the Clave let them leave Idris in peace. It was then, when I started to hate Shadowhuters – I wasn't even one of them anymore, so I wasn't acting against my own race. They acted against me! Revenge was the only thing left to me. I didn't want to search for Valentine, although I knew he was alive – now he was only an obstacle for my plan. You asked me what I wanted? I want power, I want to rule the world. And to achieve it, I have to destroy Shadowhunters. I needed Downworlders. Shadowhunters always try to make us believe they're the only thing which keeps demons from flooding our world. But it's not true. Vampires, werewolves, warlocks, and even faerie, can kill as well. And they will do it, as an expression of their gratitude for what I offered them. We are going to come out. We will be regarded as gods, warriors with supernatural powers, who protect the world from evil. Vampires will be allowed to drink human blood, and people will beg on their knees to be beaten. Werewolves and warlocks will not have to hide anymore, warlocks will not be fingered because of their looks. And in the center of it there will be me – lord, master, king. They will owe me everything."

"You are insane," Magnus cut off V's stream of words. V.'s plan sounded ridiculous.

But the man ignored him. "Only faerie didn't join me. Firstly, because they can sense a lie. So they know I am not so different from Valentine – I am going to make Downworlders my slaves, not allies, and they will serve me and they will be grateful, because I'll be everything they have. And here is the second part of my plan – I'm going to show you that there isn't any love. Especially love between Downworlders and Shadowhunters. Faerie know that already, and it's the second reason why they aren't at my side. Nephilim are liars and cheaters." Earlier, V. had been speaking at the space, with an expression of delicate daydream on his face. But now, he said straight to Magnus, his glance piercing and purple. "They use you for your magic powers only, beguiling you with assurances of friendship."

"That's not true," Magnus squealed.

"Oh, really? And that your lover boy, he always calls you only when he needs something. Healing Shadowhunters became your full-time job. And what do you get in return? Poor sex from time to time, after which he always disappears for another couple of days."

Magnus gritted his teeth. "Love is not like that. It doesn't consist in getting or wanting something in return. Selflessness, do you know that word?" He trailed off for a moment, and smirked. "By the way, sex with Alexander is never poor."

V. got up, his face expressionless, came up to Magus, and slapped him in the face, so strongly that the warlock tasted blood in his mouth, and spitted it out.

At that time, V. came back to his place. He started to stare at the daggers with alarming interest. "All these Downworlders owe me their lives. Every one of them was somehow betrayed by Nephilim: physically, in the name of their profession, or just like that, for fun." V. raised his head, and in his eyes there was… sadness? "I'll prove you that Shadowhunters regard you as a scum. After all, it isn't so easy to get rid of old habits, right? I'm sure that the Lightwoods taught their kids all wisdom. I wonder, when the boy is moaning beneath you, does he want to conceal his real disgust?"

Magnus yanked at his bonds so hard, that the chains jingled. Probably, he dislocated his wrist, too.

V. smacked his lips. "Nothing hurts like the truth?" Then this dark expression appeared on his face again. "I want them to suffer. I will cause them pain. And I need you, to do it. I'll prove you that the lover boy doesn't love you."

"Stay away from him!"

V. put on an innocent look. "But _you_ said he will come." He spread his arms. "And when I prove it, you will be mine."

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><p><strong>AN: Okay, guys. This is it. What are your thoughts? Is there anybody who doesn't hate V.? Please, review! **

**And, an important thing. This story is going on hiatus, probably till 21st of May. There won't be any updates till then. Sorry, guys! But in two weeks, I'm starting my A-levels, and I really really need to study. I know, everybody is so worried about Magnus. I can't tell you if he's going to be okay, you know I can't. What can I say? Hm, maybe that I love happy endings, but I'm always impressed by sad endings. I mean, it demands a lot of courage. But I'm a coward. Usually. **

**I know, it didn't really help. :P But be patient, and stay with me! **

**Love you all!  
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	8. To Love Is To Have Your Own Solar System

**A/N: This chapter (and the next one) actually were written around month ago (so before the hiatus) and I just had to (or still have to) type them and translate some parts (yeah, I write some parts in English and some in Polish, it looks ridiculous... Remember that English is not my native language, so excuse my mistakes. And yeah, I usually write by hand, because I love the scratching sound of my Batman pen :)). AND I STILL DIDN'T WRITE A SINGLE WORD AFTER COFA... -.- ugh. **

**Anyway, enjoy this one. (One more thing: are there any _Game of Thrones _fans? There is a slight reference to it, one sentence. I wonder if any of you will latch on ;)).  
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**Disclaimer: I don't own TMI.  
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**Chapter 8: To Love is To Have Your Own Solar System  
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**Song: In This Light and On This Evening by Editors (Disturbing and delirious. Magnus' mind. And you know what they say: you see your whole life before death. Damn long retrospection in Magnus' case. That's why London.)**

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><p>Magnus woke up, when something touched his skin. Without opening his eyes, he sighed with relief, when it turned out that everything had been just a dream. A nightmare. That thing was cool, so it couldn't been Chairman Meow's nose or tongue. Alec. The boy probably had just come back from hunting, that's why his fingers were freezing cold. The night is cold, dark and full of terrors. The Shadowhunter usually was too lazy to wear additional sweater or warmer jacket. He knew that in the end there always was a warlock, waiting for him, unnaturally warm, always ready to help. Magnus mechanically leaned into his touch, and the cold thing kissed him. The pain was so sharp, but what was worse – so sudden, violent and unexpected that red spots danced under his eyelids. Again, he sank into the darkness.<p>

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><p><em> "I don't want to disturb you". It was one of those nights, when Alec had come to his apartment in the middle of the night, in those times when their relationship had been a secret. In these moments he had been using his slender silver key. He had been standing on the doorstep, leaning over the door. At the beginning, he'd been silent. Then he'd started talking – quietly, shyly, his voice filled with emotions. And then he'd left. Every time he had been convinced that Magnus hadn't had the faintest idea about his visits – otherwise he wouldn't have been able to look Magnus' in the eye in the daylight. But Magnus always had been hearing every word. <em>

_ "I just needed to see you. I miss you so much. I wish I was brave enough to speak to my family, to tell them the truth. The truth about me, being gay." He'd swallowed loudly. "It was you, who made me admit it aloud. The truth about you. The one I love," he'd trailed off. _

_ Magnus' breath had quickened. With all his will power he had been forcing himself not to betray himself now. Everything what he had wanted it was to get up and hug the boy. And never let go. _

_ "Yes, I think I love you. I don't know if it's even possible, but I'm already attached to you, so, so strongly. And I'm afraid. Afraid of this feeling. I'm a coward. I don't know why you want to be with me. I can't give you anything." He paused, as if he had been pondering over coming closer. He added softly, "You are so beautiful."_

_ Magnus had heard it so many times, but in Alec's mouth… Those words had made him blush, almost, and sigh in pleasure._

_ Alec must have got scared by this sound, because he'd reached for a doorknob and the lock had grated. _

_ Now or never. _

_ "Alec?" Magnus had tried to make his voice sound sleepy. _

_ Alec had stopped dead in his track. He'd turned around slowly. "How long have you been awake?" he'd asked quietly. _

_ Magnus had barely opened his eyes and looked at him beneath his eyelashes. His excellent eyesight had let him discern the boy – he had been standing with his hand resting on the doorknob and he'd been blushing slightly._

_ "I'm dreaming, right?" Magnus had said hoarsely. "Don't answer, angel. I don't care. Come here."_

_ Alec's eyes had widened. His face had betrayed his thoughts: 'Magnus is thinking it's a dream. So why not? I can vanish in the morning. No harm.'_

_ Magnus had closed his eyes when he'd heard that Alec's jacket had landed on the floor. After a moment, he'd felt a pair of arms, sneaking him shyly from behind. With quiet murmur, he'd snuggled into Alec's chest, shivering from boy's cold. _

Darkness, darkness. He didn't know why he remembered exactly that night. Maybe because it was the first time when Alec said that he'd loved him.

Darkness and cold.

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><p>For some time, Magnus was just hanging torpidly in the fetters. His head was heavy, he felt numb and he was almost sure that he didn't feel any pain anymore. It was really cold – he could see his uneven shallow breathing changing into cloudlets of steam. Yet, sweat was running down his back, he was trembling feverishly. That reaction of his body wasn't normal, and for a moment Magnus started thinking if V. hadn't made use of his syringes with mysterious contents, when the warlock had been unconscious.<p>

"Where are we?" he asked hoarsely, his voice barely a whisper. He tried to clear his throat and tasted blood. V's silhouette appeared in Magnus' view – he was still ridiculously white. The man looked him in the eye, as if he expected to find there indications of madness, awareness or memory loss. After a while, he got back to his place.

"Home," V. said, so quietly that Magnus wasn't sure if that was the word. He corrected himself, "My mansion."

Magnus didn't know why he'd asked. He felt that he had to talk – he was playing for time. It was keeping him at a safe distance from the brink of a precipice, which had been waiting for him since he'd discovered that for some reason he couldn't regain his energy. Beyond the precipice, there was endless black ocean. Besides, maybe he would manage to arouse some doubts in V's mind?

"Tell me one thing. How can you, after what you've done to all those Downworlders, believe in their loyalty? They don't really need you. Not without a reason vampires and werewolves live in clans, communities. We are never alone. I think that you overestimate yourself."

"I didn't allow you to talk."

Magnus' face hardened, even though earlier he'd sounded almost nonchalant. "You didn't forbid me to talk."

V., as if casually, stood up, his face expressionless, came up to Magnus and grabbed fistful of his hair. The warlock was fully aware of a white hand getting closer to him, but he didn't move away. His cat-like eyes, full of fury, never left V's face. But it was extremely hard to stir up emotions in somebody who seemed to feel absolutely nothing. V. pulled Magnus' hair, making him straighten up. When the warlock exposed himself enough, he was treated with a kick in the gut. Magnus half growled, half groaned, and before his eyes misted over with unwanted tears, he noticed V's face twisted in disgust.

In a moment ex-Nephilim came back to his standard place – he sat beside table and shook his hands off invisible dirt.

"You have to understand that I'm doing this only for the sake of appearances," he spoke, without looking at his prisoner. "Usually I don't beat my subordinates. But this," he did a nonchalant gesture toward Magnus, "will break Lightwood's heart."

Magnus' own heart sank at the thought of Alec. At the thought of what the boy will feel, when he sees the warlock in that state. He still was completely sure that the boy would come, despite the time going by. He had no idea how much of that time had already passed, and the tiny window didn't let him find out it. But he had to be strong for Alec.

"I don't get it. He doesn't love me, but he'll come for me? It doesn't make any sense." He wanted to sow the seeds of doubt in V's mind.

But the man laughed sneeringly. "Oh, you are stupid. Old, but so stupid. It's easy to love in peace. But when I threat him that he'll die if he doesn't kill you, do you think he'll hesitate? He won't sacrifice himself for a warlock, Downworlder. Dirty slag. Everybody loves themselves the most." He laughed again, when he saw the warlock flinched. "This is what I am going to prove you – that after everything I'll be the one who is left to you. Him – that he is nothing. I want him to die in this consciousness." An expression of pure terror appeared on Magnus' face. "Oh, don't worry. I'll protect you, hold him back at the last moment." He pretended he pondered over something. "But if he kills you by some ill-fated accident, I'll be very very mad." He smiled. Even this grimace didn't wipe hard expression from his eyes.

Magnus knew he shouldn't have let himself get carried with rage. But he'd already tried to be calm, nonchalant, almost indifferent.

"What the fuck is your problem?"

"My problem? Oh no." V. shook his head, his silver hair swung. "Didn't you listen to me? The Lightwood boy is the key. I don't think he's fully aware of his… connections. He really means a lot. I mean, for his people. It's kind of amazing – he is like the Sun, with planets revolving around him. It's a kind of inner gift, I guess." He shrugged. "Oh, don't look so startled. I'm not saying this as a compliment. It's a weakness. Because when I destroy him, I will destroy them all. Blow up the Sun. Trigger off a war.

"Blue-eyed sonny boy was my undoing. Now I'll be his. I'll strip him of love. His death will provoke his parabatai's fury, his sister's, his parents'. The whole Clave will stand up for the Lightwoods. Blinded by despair and fear of their loved ones' lives, weakened by love, they won't be able to defeat me.

"I guess you had the misfortune to fell in love with the wrong guy. You still mean nothing. Just a pawn. Downworlder."

"Despite everything, you still sound like Valentine," Magnus choked out.

Unexpectedly, V. turned his head and tilted it, as if he was listening out. Then he smirked. "Here we go," he whispered, his voice trembling with excitement.

God, he was sick.

He stood up and rubbed his hands – that gesture would have seemed ridiculous if it hadn't been a signal of something terrible.

Magnus earlier had thought that he didn't feel pain anymore? Oooh, how he was wrong. V. at once stuck in a syringe into his vein, and cut his brow arch with blunt rusty knife. He felt sharp pain and blood spilled over his face. But it was nothing comparing to what started to happen in his veins. Pure fire. As if his head was immersed in water, he heard somebody's scream. Later he realized that it was his own.

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><p>They found a place indicated by Clary's rune quickly. It was a huge mansion on the outskirts of the city, pretty ordinary. It was something sick in it – all those mundanes didn't have any idea that his neighbour was a monster. In every room the lights were on, they were full of Downworlders. But they weren't Shadowhunters' target. Magnus was in the basement of V's mansion. They'd decided that Jace, Clary and Izzy would stop the Downworlders, be the focus of attention. It was Alec, of course, who had took on an assignment of rescuing Magnus. Simon hadn't come with them, after long persuasions and even a short argument with Isabelle, everybody'd agreed that it was too dangerous. He wasn't a part of their Shadowhunters' duties. When they'd divided their tasks, they headed for the door and heard piercing scream. Magnus. He sounded as if he was in agony.<p>

In one quick moment, any strategy was forgotten. Alec ran into the building, slashing and lashing blindly on his way. He didn't care if the Shadowhunters were behind his back. The only thing which mattered was Magnus – and that he needed Alec.

When he entered the darkened room, he was breathless and covered in blood – only half-sure it wasn't his blood. Despite semi-darkness, he immediately recognized the figure chained to the wall in front of him. Magnus was kneeling in a puddle of his own blood, but when he discerned Alec, he managed to smile weakly. By the Angel, Alec had never seen such dreadful view. He immediately moved toward his boyfriend, but some invisible forces kept him in place.

"Well, hello, Alexander."

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><p><strong>This is it. If you're still reading this, please, tell me what you think. Thank you all for your support and your patience, it really means a lot! I'll try to update the next one quickly and then... then I'll try to WRITE. <strong>

**Till next time! XOXO  
><strong>


	9. To Love Is To Suffer

**A/N: I know, I know. And I'm fucking sorry. But life is a mess now. Time for decisions, etc... And I have no idea what to do. NO FUCKING IDEA. Sorry. **

**Disclaimer: CC owns them.  
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**Chapter 9: To Love Is To Suffer  
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**Song: Heavy in Your Arms by Florence and the Machine**

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><p>"What did you do to him? What are you doing?" Magnus yelled.<p>

Alec's face was twisted in pain. Which was odd, since he was standing in the middle of the room, just standing, unharmed, at least at the first sight. Yet, he was in pain. And Magnus couldn't do anything to help him.

At that moment, the whole room lit up. There are ordinary fluorescent lamps at the ceiling, which were giving faint, dim light. It was typical hospital lighting and it changed Alec's pale skin into nearly green. Tears were rolling down his cheeks now, nobody knows if it was because of sudden momentary blindness or because of growing pain.

The floor around him was covered in runes, so old that they were difficult to read. They created a circle, which had closed behind Alec as soon as he'd stepped into it, unaware of a danger. It seemed that they were keeping him in place, but in addition they were hurting him.

V. smiled, stepping between Alec and Magnus. He spread his arms. "Just old, dark magic. It hurts his mind, has influence on his psyche. The rest will be mine." His smile widened, changing into ominous expression.

Alec moaned and sank to his knees.

"Now, now. Alexander." V. smacked his lips. And… he stepped into the circle.

Good, that at least gave Magnus some knowledge of those enigmatic runes – they didn't work on the outside people. He would be able to get Alec as soon as he released from these chains.

V. bent over the Shadowhunter and the blue eyes looked up at him. V. pulled out a knife and Magnus hissed at this sight. The man put it to Alec's cheek, right beneath his eye, but the boy didn't even flinch. He was just looking.

"Once, those pretty blue eyes of yours ruined my life. You just opened them, and the Clave was yours. You couldn't even speak, but you didn't have to. You were a perfect advocate of your parents. Don't you think it is a little unfair?"

One single tear escaped Alec's eye. It landed on V's knife.

"Could you…," the boy whispered, "release Magnus first? Please? I don't want him to watch."

V. eyes widened. Then he laughed and got up, leaving a small cut on Alec's cheek. "Glad you've reminded me of him."

"No! No, I didn't mean it."

But V. ignored him. He turned to Magnus. "Are you crying, warlock? I didn't know you can."

_My heart, which was taken away from me just the moment I saw him, is now in this boy's hands. And you are constantly stabbing it with a knife, tearing it into pieces. Am I crying? I'm fucking bleeding._

"Let him go," the warlock said, in perfect stable voice. It sounded like a threat.

V. just shook his head. He once again turned to Alec. "Do you love him, little Shadowhunter?"

"Yes."

"It's a shame, because you have to kill him now. Will you do it for me?"

Alec shook his head, having clenched his eyelids.

"Hm? What did you say?"

"No."

"No? Oh, well, I can make you do it."

V. kneeled down next to him, and Alec tried to move away. But the feeling of getting closer to the wall of heat caused him to stop. V. bent over him and reached his chest. Alec prepared for the pain, and… V. started to unbutton Alec's black shirt. After a while, he left Alec with bare torso, his shirt was hanging loosely around his shoulders. V. reached to his belt and pulled out a slander misericord. Before Alec could realize what was going on, he cried out, when V. slashed with it twice, leaving on Alec's chest two shallow cuts, arranging in letter "V", slowly filling up with blood.

The pain was immense, but bearable. Hell, he was a Shadowhunter. He could deal with it.

He turned his head, and when his eyes involuntarily filled up with tears, he made eye contact with Magnus. His pupils were widened – with fear, pain, guilt… Alec hated it – that he was hurting Magnus. He once again turned to V. and raised his chin.

"What about now?" V. asked and slapped him across the face. The blow was so strong that it ringed into Alec's ears.

"Fuck you," the Shadowhunter wheezed out.

V. looked pissed off. He grabbed a fistful of Alec's hair and tugged, so firmly that Alec winced. He leaned toward his ear, and Alec could feel V's hot breath on his cheek. "I guess you are used to it. Warlock's pet. You like it rough, huh? I'll have to try harder." He pushed the Shadowhunter onto the floor, and Alec shifted a little bit on a slippery surface. Slippery? He didn't even notice that his blood started to turn into a puddle.

V's back started to moving away, toward Magnus. Alec was ready to do anything to draw V's attention away from his beloved. "You really don't know what love is, do you?" he shouted. V. stopped and Magnus froze. His one arm was twisted in not natural angle, as if tore out of a joint. "I won't do it. I will never hurt him."

V. turned around. His face was expressionless. "We will see." He quickly came up to the table, which was filled with various devices, and he moved it closer to Alec. The legs of a table emitted unpleasant sound, while being dragged through the floor. "How about this?" With amazing speed, he reached for one of the daggers and threw it toward Magnus.

"NO!" Alec yelled, terrified, but the dagger stuck into the wall, right by Magnus' head.

The warlock didn't even budge. His hearing was perfect, so the swish had warned him about a danger. But something told him that V. hadn't aimed at him at all. He'd hit exactly where he'd wanted. He didn't want to hurt him. For now.

Alec was frozen.

"No? What about now?" V. threw another dagger, and this time it hit Magnus' thigh, right above the knee. Magnus slumped to the floor, and let out a short moan. He seemed surprised.

"No, please, please, stop!" Alec shouted. Tears were running down his cheeks.

"What about now?" V. reached for another weapon, but instead of throwing it, he ran it across Alec's arm, which stretched out to stop him.

Alec curled up into a ball, sobbing. One of the runes lightened, turned out from black to red. It was attacking Alec's mind with various visions: _Magnus in a puddle of his own blood, his throat slit. Magnus, naked, raped by a demon. Magnus laughing at him, his chest black with his blood, holed, his heart torn out, laying at his feet. Magnus, with black enormous wings, bloody tears running down his cheeks. _

"Stop… Please, stop…," Alec moaned, pressing fists into his eyes.

He could hear V's voice, urgent, "Kill him! Kill him!"

"No…"

Another rune flamed.

Now Alec was feeling every single thing which Magnus must have felt: twisted shoulder, cut thigh, broken ribs, bruises covering his body. Something was obscuring his right eye: blood and swelling. And then something stronger: pain, of course, but so many overwhelming emotions – rage, helplessness, fear. Why was he so devastated? What was he looking at? What was do depressing? Ah, he felt like screaming in agony. So strong emotions… and among them: love. And hate.

"Kill him!"

It was unbearable. He felt something cold on his cheek and opened his eyes. The tears blurred his vision.

V. spoke, "Do you want to know why I use a knife? Guns are to.. quick. You can't savour all the little emotions. You see, in their last moments, people show you who they really are."***** He pricked Alec's corner of an eye, and now it was Alec who was an angel crying with bloody tears. "Show me who you are, Alexander. KILL. HIM."

Strength left him already. Alec gave up. He stretched out his hand, and V. moved back, letting him choose a weapon. But the Shadowhunter in the last moment moved his arm and he almost smiled. He stuffed it into the circle, and immediately he started screaming. He was burning.

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><p>Magnus had been watching as V. had signed Alec with his initial. Like fucking Zorro. He had been watching as Alec had been beaten up. He had been watching as V. had whispered something to Alec's ear, causing him to shiver. He still had been looking at Alec's face, even when V.'s daggers had been flying around him. He had been watching as Alec'd cried, screamed in agony – and he hadn't been aware that he'd been writhing in pain. When he had been watching, he'd felt that something strange was happening with his body. As if his energy had been returning to him. Only once had he experienced similar feeling before – it was when Alec had given Magnus his strength. Usually his energy came back to him gradually, slowly, it needed time to recover. But now it was filling him like a wave, that he felt sick. When he was almost ready, few things happened at the same time: Alec started screaming so loud as if he was burning alive at the stake. Isabelle rushed into the basement, covered in blood and she quickly looked around the room. V. startled by Alec's action, was frozen because of Izzy's entrance. He tried to pull himself together, and he started to hurl everything what he had within reach at her – she managed to parry most of his attacks. In connection with her whip, V's unchaste weapons changed into ashes. Yet, two <em>shurikens <em>got stuck in her chest. Meanwhile, Alec's voice changed into hoarseness. It was this moment – blue sparks shoot out Magnus fingers – in the blink of an eye he released from the chains. He attacked V., who then was taken over by Clary and Jace – they'd just run after Isabelle. At the end, he finally got Alec. He broke the line of runes and took Alec in his arms. His body was numb, it seemed weak and so small.

"Alec. Alec?"

His chest was raising slightly.

" Magnus…?" The boy tried to open his eyes, but he was literally drowned in blood. "I can't…"

"Shh. I'm here. Everything's going to be fine. I'm here with you."

"I can't… breathe. Where are you? Why can't I see you?"

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><p><strong>*Joker's words. :3<br>**

**Okay. Shitty ending, I know. And what about Isabelle? *_* She can't die! Once again, I'm so sorry guys for not updating sooner. What is worse, I can't promise when the next update will be, because I have terrible writer's block. Not a single fucking page. Nothing. I don't know. _I lost everything. _Will Herondale understands me. God, what am I talking about? I'll shut up and try to write. **

**If you're still reading it, you'll help me by reviewing! **


	10. To Love Is To Sacrifice

**Who is proud of me? ^^ I know I am! I'm back to writing! *dances in happiness* God, it feels so goood. **

**Disclaimer: Still own nothing. Maybe V. :3  
><strong>

**Chapter 10: To Love Is To Sacrifice  
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**Song: There are two this time. _Sister_ by Mumford & Sons (Cassie once said it was a perfect song for Izzy. I think so, too. So it is a song for the first part of this chapter.) And the second one: _Turning Page _by Sleeping at Last (God. Amazing. Mostly Magnus' point of view on Alec. _Nothing makes me stronger than your fragile heart._)**

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><p>"Alexander. What do you mean you can't see me? I'm right here."<p>

"I know. I can feel you. I just can't see you." Alec stopped crying long ago, but drained tracks of tears were still standing out against bloody background.

Magnus' hands were shaking, but he couldn't afford it. Feverishly, he started to wipe Alec's face off blood, trying to uncover his field of vision.

"Magnus. Stop." He didn't. "Stop. I need you to – " The boy gasped and lost consciousness.

Magnus, having felt Alec's numb palm into his hand, realized that something was wrong. He stopped his ministrations and finally focused enough to examine the whole form of the Shadowhunter. He was a mess. His chest was bare – pale and cut. But his arm – it was burned, covered in small blisters, pus was oozing out from them, the skin was almost carbonized in places, and still so hot that the heat was belching out form it. Magnus immediately set to work, but shortly he realized that his energy had left him as fast as it'd appeared. Freeing himself of chains and destroying the old-magical circle had drained him, and additionally losing his own blood had caused him to be barely conscious. He could think of only one person who could help,

"Jace!" he shouted, without turning his gaze from Alec's motionless body.

Alec's parabatai didn't come immediately. The warlock completely forgot about V. – Jace and Clary managed to beat him: he was laying captured in runic cuffs, which were entwined around his wrists and ankles. He was following Jace with his full of insanity eyes. The boy was drawing some kind of rune on his arm – probably to take away his consciousness.

For a short moment Magnus wondered why Jace just didn't kill V. The boy's jaws were clenched, and he was pushing away Clary, pointing at something with his chin. The girl nodded and turned around. She came up to the black figure, which was laying motionless on the floor. Isabelle. The girl was wounded, but she was breathing. She opened her eyes as Clary bent over her, and she tried to stand up. But, she moaned, and collapsed onto the floor again.

"Jace!" Magnus repeated. This time, the boy listened.

"How is he?" He ran up to Magnus and Alec, and knelt next to his parabatai, at his other side.

"I need your strength. Quickly," Magnus said, ignoring a lump in his throat, fixing his eyes on Alec. He held out his hands and soon he felt into them the warmth of Jace's. He was ready for familiar surge of energy… and he felt pain. As if million needles were pricking his fingertips. The feeling caused him to scream.

"What?" Jace looked at him strangely, and then at his own hands. "Did I do something – "

"Again," Magnus growled.

And again the same happened. This time Jace screamed, too, when Magnus pulled his hands rather brutally.

"Magnus, wait…"

"Again!"

"It's not working. I think that my extra Angel's blood is rejecting you. You are a half-demon, after all."

Magnus looked at him, his eyes wide open. "Clary!"

The girl raised her head form her place, still next to Isabelle's motionless body.

Jace grabbed his wrist. "It's not going to work, either. She has Angel's blood too, remember?"

Magnus shook his head. "Then what – "

Meanwhile, Isabelle appeared at his side. With Clary's help, she'd managed to get up, but after reaching his goal, she sank to the floor once again. She leaned over Jace.

"I'll give you my strength."

" Isabelle… You are hurt, bleeding…"

"I don't care. Clary drew me an_ Iratze_." Despite the rune, fresh blood was still oozing form her two wounds in her chest – they must've been pretty deep. Seeing Magnus' hesitant expression, her face hardened. "It's nothing. After all, you can heal me too. Just fucking do it. He's my brother." She started coughing and Magnus took her by the hand. "Save him. I'm begging you. Save him."

The warlock took her other hand and she closed her eyes.

"Ready?" he asked, wanting to make sure, one last time.

She nodded. "Do what you must."

Almost immediately, the darkness engulfed her.

* * *

><p>He wasn't laying in his bed – it was the first thing he felt. Indeed, his bed in the Institute maybe wasn't so comfortable, but hell, it felt like he was laying on the floor. He opened his eyes… and…<p>

…his vision was blurred, something was covering his right eye. He tried to remove it, and somebody clutched his wrist.

"Easy," someone said with a chuckle.

Alec blinked once and saw Jace. His parabatai got all smeared with blood, but he was smiling. In one moment, Alec remembered what had happened – it was as if he'd never forgotten – V., his insane plan, pain. And Magnus.

"Where is he?" Alec asked, panicked.

"Oh, relax. Clave is going to take care of that bastard. We're waiting for them, actually."

"Not V.! Magnus!" he shouted.

Jace's smile grew wider. "He passed-out after healing you and Izzy. He didn't have enough strength to heal himself, though. We've dressed him." He added quickly, "More or less."

"What?" Alec yelled. "And Izzy got hurt, too?" He tried to get up and hissed in pain.

"By the Angel, Alec. Just slow down. Even Magnus couldn't heal your eye and arm properly, and your bruises – they always stay the longest. You'll have to heal like a mundane."

"But – "

"They'll be fine. Clave will be here soon, and Maryse, too. Then we'll move you."

Alec sighed and closed his eyes. Eye, since the other was covered by some piece of rag. "Can I at least see him?" he asked in trembling whisper.

"He is just right here."

Magnus was laying on that side of Alec where his wounded eye were, that's why he didn't see him at once. His head was on Clary's knees, and the girl smiled slightly at Alec. Izzy, in turn, had her head on Magnus' shoulder, and she was unconscious, too.

Alec finally sighed with relief. _Magnus_. Magnus was safe. Now he could focus on his own injuries – he couldn't see anything with his right eye. He couldn't be sure if it was because of the dressing, or he was just blind. What he knew, that it hurt as hell. Had V. tried to pluck out his eyes? Then – his arm. Putting it into the wall of heat had supposed to be an act of mercy to himself – he'd rather die, burn, than hurt Magnus. He hadn't been thinking rationally – well, what would V. do after such thing to Magnus? He had done stupid thing, but at least it'd drawn V's attention enough to defeat him. But what if his arm would never be working again? He was a Shadowhunter, he couldn't even think such scenario. He had to focus on something else – at least until they found themselves in the infirmary and the final verdict on his health was reached. He listened raptly to Jace's steady breathing – the boy was still seating next to him, he never left his side. Alec thought he smiled, though he wasn't sure about it, because he fell asleep.

* * *

><p>When he woke up again, it was cold. Familiar scent told him he was in the Institute's infirmary. He shivered. He didn't like that place at all. He felt warmth in his palm, smooth skin against his own, scarred. He heard a whisper, "You're awake." He tried to open his eyes – something still was covering his right eye. And finally, he saw <em>him.<em>

Magnus was sitting on a hard chair, right at his bed. In the light of dawn he looked like an angel. He didn't have any trace or signs of blood and dirt on his body, but he still wasn't fully himself – his face was free of any make-up, hair left down, clothes toned. He wasn't smiling.

"What you've done…"

Alec started shaking violently. "I'm so sorry. I should have stopped him. I-I was too weak – "

"What? No!" Magnus squeezed his fingers. "That's not what I mean, Alexander. I mean… you sacrificed yourself. For me. You were ready to give up your life." Magnus trailed off for a moment and lowered his eyes. His throat was tightened.

Alec used it to speak up, "Of course. I love you so much." Magnus looked at him. "I love you, do you hear me? Don't you believe in me? I couldn't have hurt you," Alec flinched, "kill you, never. What are you talking about, anyway?"

Magnus leaned towards him, and put his forehead against Alec's. Their gazes met – full of love, and panic (Alec), and care (Magnus).

"Shh. Okay. I shouldn't have said such things."

"Of course you shouldn't." Alec sighed.

Magnus returned to his place and it was then when Alec felt so overwhelmed by that whole situation – what'd happened, all sustained wounds, but most importantly, what could've happened – how close they had been to losing each other. He remembered all those visions, with which V.'d been attacking his mind, and his chin started to quiver unwittingly. He felt like a child, and what frightened him the most it was that he couldn't control it, couldn't help it at all.

Magnus saw it. "Alec? Alec, what's wrong?"

The boy whimpered, "Magnus…" and started crying. Tears were dripping down his cheek, as if deliberately.

"Alec! You are safe now. You – "

"Take me home," he whispered. "Please, take me home."

Magnus was speechless. Alec looked so… vulnerable. That's why he just reached for the thin blanket covering Alec, tossed it aside (Alec helped him by kicking it away and throwing his arms around Magnus' neck like a baby) and he lift him up. The Shadowhunter nestled his face into Magnus' neck, so the warlock could feel when the boy stopped crying – not until had they reached the staircase of his apartment in Brooklyn. They came there by a taxi, like mundanes – firstly, because Magnus still didn't have enough energy to create a portal, and secondly, to give Alec time to cool down.

By the time, Alec fell asleep. _Good, _Magnus thought, _he needs rest. _He laid him down in the bedroom, and covered him with two blankets – the boy never stopped shivering. But as soon as he tore apart from him – having left a kiss on the boy's forehead, and then there was nothing connecting their bodies – Alec cringed and opened his eye.

"Please, don't leave me," he said quietly.

Magnus drew the curtains, to create the atmosphere of a night and climbed onto bed, still fully clothed. Alec immediately clung to him, and inhaled his scent.

"Try to sleep, baby," Magnus murmured, kissing Alec's hair.

Alec shook his head. "Not yet. Tell me first, how long have I been in infirmary?"

"About 24 hours. The rest of _that _day, and the whole night. You woke up at dawn."

Alec smiled briefly. "And I saw you." With one hand Magnus was massaging his scalp, and it caused shivers to run down his spine. He sighed. "How is Izzy doing, then?"

"Still in bed – and it drives her nuts. It all looked pretty ugly, but I did everything I could – and it was a lot, believe me. Now she needs sleep. Actually, she was in infirmary with us, but you were…," he cleared his throat, "too… distracted to notice. She was sleeping, though."

Alec closed his eye for a moment. He was embarrassed of his small breakdown. Okay, it wasn't small. "Thank you," he just whispered. And he wasn't sure if it was thanking for Izzy or for Magnus' discretion and tactfulness.

Magnus stroked Alec's clothed arm, and it reminded him of another issue. "How bad is it?" he asked in small voice.

"What, darling?"

"My wounds. My eye," he gulped, "and my arm."

"Relax. It's not that bad. Your arm needs my treatment every 24 hours – I treated it right before you woke up – because the burns on it have a tendency to renew. I'm not entirely sure why, it's old and dark magic. But it won't be forever like it, I can see the improvement already. Soon you'll have only a few new scars. Not a big deal for you."

Magnus smiled, but Alec winced. He already felt like an ugly beast, comparing to Magnus. He swallowed hardly, trying to stop the fucking tears. "And my eye?"

"The worst part is that it has to be healing like a mundane's. You can't put an _Iratze _exactly on an eye, can you? It's too sensitive. But it'll be okay, you will not be blind. You just have to wear an eye-patch for a while, to protect it. You look like a pirate, you know?"

Alec snorted. But he was grateful – Magnus tried to joke, tried to make him smile, when he felt miserable. He wasn't sure why. They were safe, they had each other, yeah? But he was… anxious. He had one last question, for now. "What about V.?" He hated it that his voice trembled.

Magnus tensed. "He is awaiting for his trial. He'll probably get a death sentence. Clave is making a great spectacle of the whole thing, I guess as a warning. It's the biggest deal since Valentine – another division among Nephilim. As for his followers – I mean those who weren't killed by Isabelle, Jace or Clary – they won't be punished too harshly. After all, deprived of love – you aren't yourself. Werewolves and vampires will be assigned to Praetor Lupus. Warlocks will be taken care by other warlocks."

"You will have much work, then." The boy's voice was thick.

"Oh no. They won't ask me. Clave knows that if I saw any of them, I would kill them. Without hesitation."

Alec shivered. "Why?"

Magnus shifted in his place. He buried his face into Alec's hair. "I'm tired, and so are you. Go to sleep, okay? Then we'll talk."

And really, Alec was too exhausted to argue. "Okay." And, somehow, he forgot to add _'I love you.'_

* * *

><p>Magnus, though, didn't fall asleep. Even now, he couldn't exactly believe that it was <em>Alec<em> who was laying into his arms. That his arm was wrapped around his _Alec_, that he could feel _Alec's_ steady breathing on his skin. Maybe he was pretending, for his own sake, but most importantly – for Alec, that recent events hadn't made permanent impression on him. But truth be told, having been hanging in chains and looking at Alec's suffering, he'd expected death. He'd been almost sure that this time they wouldn't make it.

But what moved him the deepest? Love is usually untouchable. You can't see it or smell it. Gifts, which are supposed to be proofs of love, are material things only, and in the face of true affection, they don't really matter. But back there, in that dark basement, Magus had _seen _love. Having been looking at Alec, in the puddle of his own blood, and knowing it was all for Magnus – it'd made him realize something. Of course he knew the Shadowhunter loved him – the boy said it frequently enough, but to see it – really really _see_ it – it was another story. And now the boy was clutching at him, as if he needed to prove himself that his sacrifice – pain and perseverance – was not wasted. It was beautiful feeling, but also terrifying – knowing there is somebody who is ready to lay down their life for you. Even though you wouldn't want them to do it. Sometimes, love is about making decisions against beloved person – for their own good. You don't think then how the world would seem without you – the only important thing is that this person would be safe. But now, Magnus couldn't imagine life without Alec. He knew, such commitment wasn't good idea in their case, but you can't love only partly or in one half. Death was his constant companion. He'd watched before as his lovers died, because of an old-age. He'd always just watched. But now, now he felt like fighting, with all his strength, even though it wasn't enough. With Alexander, it was even harder – he was a Shadowhunter, Death was his constant companion, too. Perhaps he shouldn't have thought about it now (or even in the future), maybe he should have given himself over happiness. But V. had accomplished one goal: he'd shown them fragility of their love.

Magnus was about to sigh dramatically, when he felt Alec stirred at his side. The warlock looked down at his face: his eyes were closed, he was still sleeping. His brows were knit together, tiny drop of sweat between them. Suddenly, Alec trashed against the sheets and screamed. Then he whimpered, "Please."

Magnus immediately shook his boyfriend's shoulder. "Alec. Wake up. It's just a nightmare."

He didn't though. He started crying, his eyes still closed, and moaned quietly. "No. No, please, not Magnus!"

Upon hearing his name, said in such tone – so terrified and desperate – Magnus shouted, "Alec! Wake up!"

Alec's eyes finally shot open. He stumbled from the bed and hit the floor, tangled in sweat and blankets.

"No, no, no, no, noooooo…"

Magnus could hear the boy hadn't stopped crying. He got up, went around the bed and held out his hand to touch Alec's shoulder.

The Shadowhunter screamed, "Don't touch me!" He got up quickly and stumbling over invisible things, squeezed into the further corner of the room. He started to tremble.

Magnus stood frozen. "Alexander. Alec, it's me. Magnus."

Alec looked at him, apparently still wasn't sure about who was standing in front of him. His face was flushed and wet, his knees tucked under his chin. "M – Magnus?" he asked, his voice faltering and shaking.

"Yes, baby. Yes, it's me, Magnus."

Alec lowered his hands and climbed to his knees. He crawled up a little bit, seeming somehow… insane. "Magnus! I thought you are dead!" He shook violently, upon hearing what he'd just said.

"Baby, no!" Magnus sank to his own knees, still a little bit unsure about touching Alec. "It was a dream, a nightmare. I am here, with you. Very much alive."

"Magnus!" Alec half-whimpered, half-sighed, and threw himself into the warlock's arms. He was repeating Magnus' name like a mantra, and it was then when he finally realized it really was just a terrible dream.

"Shh, baby. I'm here. You are safe. We are safe." Magnus knew his voice was soothing Alec, so he keep saying random words.

"You are safe. That's the only thing that matters to me."

Magnus closed his eyes for a while. "I know," he whispered. "Unfortunately, I know."

They stayed like that for who knows how long. Alec, lulled in Magnus' arms. Magnus, from time to time giving Alec butterfly kisses: Alec's hair, Alec's temples, eyelids, nose, cheeks… Alec's lips… Oh, those lips…

"Let's go to bed, Magnus," Alec finally whispered.

The warlock just lift him up and put him in bed, then he laid next to him and covered them with yellow comforter. Alec immediately snuggled against Magnus' torso.

"I thought I've lost you," he mumbled into the fabric of his boyfriend's T-shirt.

"That will never happen, my love," was Magnus' reply.

Alec was silent for a moment. "I'm sorry," he finally chocked out.

"For what, love?"

"For freaking out. And the nightmare."

Magnus almost chuckled. "You can't control your dreams, Alexander. You have nothing to apologize for. You've been through a lot. We've been through a lot. You have every right to be scared."

"You are not."

Magnus was silent.

"I am weak. And I am sorry, even though my apology probably has no value to anyone. I am a warrior, I should be fearless…"

Magnus finally stopped him. He shifted them, so now they were facing each other. "Alexander. You are brave. You are one of the bravest people I've ever met. Not only do you fight for the safety of this world, but you also fight for love, for your family. You are loyal – hell, first thing you ask is your sister's doing, not your own health! And you shouldn't want to be fearless – it's human's quality, human's virtue – to feel, to love, and to be afraid of losing people you love. To fear – it makes you stronger. You saw what happens to people who are not afraid of anything – V. lost his mind. There is nothing shameful about love and fear. It makes you real. It makes you human."

Alec cut off his monologue by breathtaking (literally) embrace. He hid his face into Magnus' shirt and started sobbing. Soon, Magnus' front T-shirt was wet. Bu the warlock made Alec look at him one more time. The boy put his chin on Magnus' chest and the lighting blue met gold-green.

"You said I wasn't scared? I was terrified, Alec. I still am." Alec looked like he couldn't believe what he heard. So Magnus went on, "You are my everything. You've awoken my soul. You've made me human. I can't lose you."

"You won't. I am yours, and you are mine. Forever."

Even if they both knew it wasn't exactly the truth, they didn't care now.

Alec leaned on his elbows and kissed Magnus. It was their first kiss since _those _events. It tasted of… Fear. Longing. Love. Alec bit lightly on Magnus' lower lip, and the warlock sighed. He used it to slip his tongue in and he could savoured his boyfriend.

"I love you," Alec finally said, after gasping for air. He didn't miss those words this time.

"I love you," Magnus responded.

The nightmare wouldn't come back anymore.

* * *

><p><strong>(Don't worry, it's not over yet! It might sound like it, but it isn't! :P)<br>**

**Okay. Now I would like to thank three people: HikariMelody, mudkipluvr4ever and BurningCrystalEyes - not only for your reviews on the last chapter, but for supporting me, etc. You literally made me keep writing! You're amazing! Thank you so much! :) Especially you, Belle. (I love you :3)**

**As for the rest of you (haha, sounds creepy xD). But seriously, I feel like you gave up on this story already. I can see it that some of you are still reading it (I have stats, you know xD), but I'd like to see some feedback, too. Because, if you don't like it anymore, you could say it, and I'll try to fix it, okay? Now I feel like I did something wrong (is it because of my lazy updates? or because it just got shitty?) Please, tell me, and then maybe I'll stop to worry so much :D  
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**Thanks for reading!  
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	11. To Love Is To Appreciate Silence

**A/N: This one is rather a filler. Drugged Alec (:D), the Lightwoods' time, Iz/Magnus because I love these two. And rather important note below. Thanks for reading! :)**

**Disclaimer: I don't own TMI.  
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**Chapter 11: To Love Is To Appreciate Silence  
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**Song: From Now On by The Features (suits Alec's mood :D).**

* * *

><p>The next morning, Alec felt extremely sore. Only then did his body start to fully feel all the effects of clash with V. – when all the tension had eased. He groaned and turned onto his back. He could felt Magnus' warmth beside him. With one hand, he wiped his eye from the last remains of sleep, and looked at his boyfriend. The warlock was still asleep. His face was free of any tension, but even after the night, signs of exhaustions were still visible – shadows under the eyes and unusual, as for Magnus, paleness.<p>

Alec suddenly felt ashamed. Yesterday had been all about himself. He'd been crying all the time, acting like a child, wallowing in self-pity, but mostly – he'd been dying of happiness that everything had ended well. And Magnus had been at his side all the time, doggedly – he'd been comforting him, making him laugh, assuring him that he loved him. He was so strong, even though he'd been through much more than Alec – being with V. one-on-one must have been a trauma. Alec, more than at any time, felt he didn't deserve such an amazing boyfriend. He caressed Magnus' cheek lovingly, and upon his touch, the warlock's eyes flew open.

"Good morning, baby," Alec murmured softly.

Magnus smiled dreamily. "I could wake up every day to such greeting."

Alec propped himself on his elbow and kissed Magnus lightly. Then he winced, "Ow."

"What's wrong?" Magnus immediately got worried and he sat up.

"It's nothing. Just everything hurts."

Magnus mirrored his pained expression. "Yeah, I guess I know what you mean. You could use a sponge bath, hm?" He smiled wickedly.

Alec grinned. "Only if you join me."

Magnus stood up. His clothes were all wrinkled, but to Alec he looked beautiful. "I'll prepare water, and you eat something, okay?"

Alec nodded and left a quick peck on Magnus' cheek. He was about to disappear into the kitchen, when he shouted, "I love you!"

"I know!" his boyfriend shouted back.

Somehow, he knew Magnus was smiling.

When he entered the bathroom, a pack of Oreo in his hand and one cookie already in his mouth, he was startled by a surprising sight: Magnus' naked ass, standing proudly into the air, the warlock bent over a huge bathtub, apparently checking the temperature of the water. He spun around, as if feeling Alec's presence.

"Oh, hello, darling." He eyed Alec's opened mouth and then his hands. "Oreo? No milk?"

Alec finally regained his voice. "Nope. I guess Chairman had his way with it."

Magnus wrinkled his nose. "I can't eat it without milk. It's no fun."

Alec just shrugged and threw the pack onto the counter. "OK, now. I really, really need this bath." He stood in the middle of the bathroom and closed his eyes. He spread his arms, and even if he knew that he was blushing – he was waiting. He was determined – he missed Magnus' touch, but in some other meaning than yesterday, in more… erotic way. Magnus didn't move, so he opened his one eye.

"What are you waiting for? You promised to give me a sponge bath. I thought it included stripping me down."

Realization glowed in Magnus' cat-like eyes. He moved gracefully toward his boyfriend and when he reached him, he wrapped his arms around Alec's neck. He bit lightly onto Alec's earlobe and whispered seductively, "Your wish is my command."

The Shadowhunter shivered and closed his eye.

Magnus started with the T-shirt. He rolled it up, slowly, teasingly, caressing Alec's already hard nipples. The boy sighed in content and raised his hands above his head, letting Magnus toss the superfluous clothing aside. And then his scars became visible, nothing covering them. Magnus' eyes darkened at this sight. Gently, he passed his fingers over them, his touches feather-like, tracing the "V" pattern on Alec's chest. It was fading away, but nonetheless, it was still there – forcing them to remember and not allowing to forget. Bruises were standing out against pale background. Some of them had yellowed already, other were the colour of fierce purple. It was hurting Magnus – to see Alec in such state, but what was more – it was driving him mad. He wanted nothing more than V. to hurt as much as them. But how? V. apparently had no heart. Ad it wasn't like Magnus could even touch somebody whose only sin was to be loved by someone as insane as V. He was not cruel.

He was absentmindedly sliding his palms up and down Alec's sides, but the boy snapped him out of his thoughts by saying, almost praying, "God, don't stop."

He kissed Alec's jaw, Alec's neck – nipping at sensitive skin there and the boy moaned. He moved his hands down, his fingers right at the zipper of Alec's pants. "What do you want me to do?" he asked, his voice low and husky.

Alec gulped, his eyes still closed. "Take them off, please."

Magnus smirked. "You shouldn't have asked me for help, then."

All of sudden, he grabbed Alec's ass and pushed him forward – their groins met. Magnus was naked – and, oh, what the rough material of Alec's jeans was doing to him… He panted and Alec squeezed his shoulder. "Baby, please…"

Since he asked so nicely…

Magnus undone the zipper and then hooked his thumbs under the hem of Alec's pants. He planted a kiss on the Shadowhunter's chest – right under his collarbone, and at the same time slid his pants and underwear down. Alec was finally free and he exhaled loudly.

"Are you – " pant, " – done?" Alec tried to sound unmoved.

"Not yet. Keep your eyes closed."

Magnus put one warm palm on Alec's healthy eye, and with other – he started to maneuver around ends of the eye-patch. When he loosened it enough, he slipped his fingers under it. He felt Alec's eyelashes tickled his fingertips. He used some magic – only a little, just to alleviate the shock of using an eye first time after so long. And then he let the eye-patch fell – it landed somewhere around Alec's feet – but he covered the eye with his hand. He could tell Alec was holding his breath. "Ready?" Magnus asked.

The boy nodded. Magnus lowered his hands and moved away a little, to give Alec time for adjusting to the new situation.

Alec's eyelids slowly raised. His other eye was a little bit swollen, red and bloodshot, but, God, how Magnus had missed it. He loved Alec's blue orbs.

The Shadowhunter blinked - once, twice. And then his eyes started to water.

"Baby? What's wrong?" Magnus was obviously worried. "Does it hurt?"

Alec just shook his head and bit his lower lip.

"Then what is it?" Magnus put a hand on Alec's cheek and wiped away a tear, which had felt involuntarily.

"It's just… you are so beautiful."

Magnus laughed sympathetically. "It's that why you are crying?"

Alec hung his head. He mumbled, "I'm not crying."

"Oh, no, no, no." Magnus took Alec's chin between his two fingers and raised it. "I'm not missing these two again."

Alec tried to pout, but failed miserably when a huge smile broke across his lips. It brightened his whole face, and he could see he was glowing in Magnus' eyes.

"Come on. I bet the water grew cold by now." Magnus took Alec's hand.

"Such luck I have a warlock boyfriend." Alec grinned and followed Magnus to the bathtub.

They settled in hot, bubbly water in comfortable position – Alec's back to Magnus' chest. Magnus spread his legs so Alec could fit there. The Shadowhunter's hands were resting on Magnus' knees. The boy was tracing random patterns there, but stopped when he felt something beneath his fingertips. "It'd left a scar here."

They both knew what "it" meant. Magnus brushed Alec's hair off his nape and kissed the exposed place. "Don't think about it."

And, really, it was easy to forget, at least for that moment, under Magnus' magical hands and Magnus' magical touches.

The warlock wasn't kidding about the sponge-bath. He reached for a pink sponge and one of his many shower gels. This one smelled of sandalwood. He started with small circles across Alec's back, until the boy relaxed completely. Then he moved to his chest – he sneaked his long arms there, Alec's head resting on Magnus' shoulder now. In that position he could see very well Alec's facial expression – which shortly turned into this one of absolute bliss. It turned Magnus on incredibly, and he must have poked Alec into his loins, because the boy looked at him from under his heavy eyelids and smiled lazily. And Magnus didn't even reached Alec's member, truth be told, he had no intentions. Maybe Alec himself wasn't aware of it, but Magnus knew the boy was still run ragged. And it wasn't the time for exhausting orgasm. So, in no time, his motions became slower, and slower, Alec's eyelids heavier, and heavier… and he finally stopped.

"Okay, I think it's time for us to get up," Magnus spoke up in low voice, as if he was afraid of ruining such a perfect moment.

Alec's eyes snapped open. It felt like eternity – the two, laying into each other's arms, hot water around them, everywhere (but seriously, it wouldn't have been so hot after all, if it hadn't been for Magnus). Had he fallen asleep? "What?" he asked.

Alec's feeling of being lost was a confirmation of Magnus' thoughts. "Come on, get up." He stood up and held out his hand for his boyfriend.

"But Magnuuus," Alec whined, "I'm still hard."

Magnus just looked at him patronizingly.

Alec frowned. What was with that look? But he stood up anyway, ignoring Magnus' hand – and he slipped. He would have killed himself, smashing his head on the bathroom tiles, if Magnus hadn't caught him. At the same time, the warlock conjured up two fluffy towels – pink for himself, which wrapped around his waist magically, and navy for Alec. He flung it onto Alec's shoulders and he started to drain him – beginning with the head. He left Alec's hair mussed and damp. It felt into his eyes and Alec shook his head, slightly irritated. "What are you doing?"

"Taking care of you." Was Magnus' simple response.

He led them to the living room – Alec still ridiculously wrapped in the towel, like a baby – and sat him on the couch.

"Give me your arm," Magnus commanded and there was no arguing with his warlock's tone. So, somehow, Alec managed to get his arms from under that enormous towel. He pouted when Magnus took it and investigated it with nothing but a professional look.

Magnus noticed Alec's dissatisfaction. So, firstly, he blew onto Alec's skin, which was still unnaturally warm there. It was enough to cause chills to run down his spine. But then Magnus included his magic – it'd been 24 hours since their last treatment session – and blue flames fired off his fingers. Alec shivered in pleasure. Magnus knew, even if the boy never admitted it, that Alec absolutely loved this feeling.

"Do you like it?" He asked hoarsely, after Alec threw back his head and almost purred.

"Y – Yes…"

Magnus, without stopping the process of healing, bent over and kissed Alec's neck – since he wouldn't managed to reach his mouth without shifting his position. The Shadowhunter moaned and Magnus mirrored it. "Mmm. I love you," he murmured into Alec's hot skin.

"Ah, Magnus." Oops. Now Alec was totally turned on, he could feel it. "Mmm, take me."

He stopped brutally his ministrations – blue flames and kissing.

Alec looked down at him – flushed, panting and obviously disappointed. "Why did you stop?"

"Because we can't do this." Magus hated being the responsible one.

"What?"

"You're tired."

"No! I'm fucking hard!"

Magnus sighed. "And now, drugged, too." Sometimes, his magic had that effect – like real medicines.

Alec decided that with anger he was not going to get very far in that matter. He tried with plea. "But you always leave me so horny after healing. And I always feel it - little tingles in the ends of my body: my fingertips, my toes, my cock…"

"Yeah, you are definitely drugged. It would be almost like taking advantage of you, and we don't want it, do we?"

"I don't give a fuck!" Alec trailed off suddenly and pondered for a moment. Then he smiled mischievously, and it didn't seem… sober. "Hmm, actually, after second thought, I could give a fuck. A nice, good fuck for my boyfriend. Don't you want it, Mmmmagnus?"

"Yes, I mean, no."

Begging, then?

"I need you, Magnus, please. I'm naked under this big, ugly towel, and waiting for you… And all this fluff on your lap can't help you – I can see you need me too… Please, Mag, baby, please…"

"Alexander…"

"Pretty please with glitter on top? Please?"

Magnus dug into his lips with surprising aggression, and Alec even hadn't had enough time to smile triumphantly. Magnus started ravishing the boy's neck and chest, but strangely, the Shadowhunter's breathing, instead of quickening, became steady. And then Magnus looked up, from behind his still a little bit damp hair – Alec eyes were closed, dreamily smile across his slightly parted, bruised by kisses, lips – he'd fallen asleep. Great. Just great. And now it was Magnus who was left hard.

* * *

><p>Isabelle was laying in a bed in the infirmary, staring bluntly at the ceiling. Everything was disturbing: rough sheets, thin blanket, stuffed pillow under her head. She wanted to get up, go out, kill some demons, but what she wanted the most it was…<p>

She heard movement by the door and turned her gaze at it.

Jace stepped in, his hands in pockets, a weak smile on his lips, his hair mussed, as if he had just rolled out of a bed.

"Hi, Iz."

"You know what sucks?" she said in a place of greeting. She wasn't waiting for an answer. "Having a vampire boyfriend."

Jace smirked, sitting on a chair next to her bed. "Because he can't control his fangs when he's horny?"

"No, you idiot!" Izzy tried to smack his knee, but he managed to move it away just in time. "Because he can't come here! He can't visit me while I'm laying alone in a hospital – you know what I mean, it sounds more dramatic that way; he can't bring flowers and put them by my bed…"

"Seriously, Iz? You would want him to see you like this?"

She knew Jace wasn't talking about her appearance - even without any make-up, in nothing more than just her pajamas, with her hair tied in a loose bun – she was beautiful. He rather meant her state – weak, defeated. Even if he wasn't thinking Izzy was weak, not at all, he knew she thought that.

She looked at him attentively. "Yeah. You're right."

Jace grinned. "I'm always right."

She stuck her tongue out at him, and tried to sit up. Jace got up to help her, but she shooed him away. She winced, but managed to put the pillow behind her head in just enough comfortable position. "Tell me now, how's Alec? Where is he, anyway?" She looked around. Last time she'd seen him, he'd been there, sleeping, with Magnus at his side.

Jace shrugged, and assumed a weird face, as if he tried to mask some emotions. But Isabelle looked through it – concern and… guilt?

"I'm not sure, probably at Magnus'. He didn't tell anything anyone, that irresponsible bastard." Jace clenched his fists.

"Hey, give him a break. After everything, he has every right – "

Jace cut her off, "After everything, he should at least tell me where he is! I am his parabatai!"

"Are you jealous, Jace Lightwood?"

Jace became indignant, "Of course not! I'm just…"

"Worried." He opened his mouth to say something, probably to deny, but she didn't let him. "So am I. I understand, Jace, he's our brother."

"No. You don't."

Something in his face, in his tone, told her to be silent. She saw… pain in those beautiful, golden eyes. She wanted to comfort him, but she had no idea how.

"It's just… I…" Jace looked her right in the eyes. It literally hurt her to see him like that. "Thank you, Isabelle," he whispered.

She was stunned. She was totally, completely and entirely stunned. "What?"

He didn't lower his gaze, now it was full of gratitude. "You saved him. While I couldn't. And I can't forgive myself for not being able to do it. He needed me, and I was useless…" He trailed off, to take a deep breath. He added in quiet voice, "I don't know what I would do without him. _'Wither thou goest, I will go.' _I think…"

"Don't say it, Jace." Isabelle didn't know what to do with her hands. Should she put one of them on Jace's shoulder? It was supposed to be a comforting gesture, wasn't it? But she wasn't good at those things. So she just sat there, and talked. "You shouldn't have thanked me. He is my brother. I didn't save him. Magnus did, I just simply – "

"Isabelle." He hardly ever used her full name.

And then they were just looking at each other, without saying another word. And she instantly knew what to do now – she slowly wrapped her arms around Jace's neck and kissed his cheek.

"Love you, bro."

She could fell Jace's smile on her own cheek.

Then they just chatted cheerfully, until Clary came in and suggested going to Magnus' and checking on Alec. Jace, not that he would ever admit it, was relieved that somebody finally offered it. Izzy was the only one who wasn't happy at all – she didn't want to be left alone again. But Clary smiled at her. "Your mom said you could come with us. I'm here to transfer her decision."

Izzy squealed and was about to jump off the bed, when the girl stopped her. "Calm down, Jesus! You have to spare yourself. It's the only condition."

Isabelle tried to hide her excitement, but failed. She almost ran off the infirmary, her ebony hair flying behind her, when Clary shouted after her, "I've already called Simon!"

She could hear Izzy's giggles, filling the corridors.

* * *

><p>When they came to Magnus' apartment: Jace, Clary, Izzy and Simon, and Jace was about to knock, the door opened.<p>

Magnus was standing there, leaning heavily against the doorframe. He looked…

"You look terrible," Jace blurted out.

Magnus made a face. "Thank you very much, blondie. But I'm exhausted." He waved his hand. "Come in."

They all followed Magnus in. Jace didn't drop the subject, though. "Why? Having kinky sex all night with my brother drained you?"

Magnus actually snorted at his. "Nope. He isn't up for this yet. Though, he thinks different."

Isabelle noticed Magnus smirked to his own thoughts or memories.

Meanwhile, they entered the living room. Alec was there, sleeping on a couch, cuddling around himself, his mouth slightly opened. To Isabelle, he looked adorable: so young and innocent. But Jace had to ruin the moment, again, "That's why he's naked under this blanket?" He looked suspicious and… amused.

Magnus answered, "He's been… difficult. But I'll deal with it. He needs sleep, though, so come to the kitchen, kids."

They sat comfortably around a big table and Magnus offered them some cookies and tea. Clary started talking to Simon, and Jace was listening to that conversation, while putting an enormous number of cookies into his mouth.

Izzy used this moment to talk to Magnus, who was leaning against the kitchen counter, a steaming mug in his hands. She nudged him in the side to get his attention (he seemed a little… off) and the liquid swayed dangerously.

Magnus looked at her, and the corners of his mouth raised. "Good to see you back on your feet. Everything's okay, I assume?" he said.

"Yeah, thanks. But what about you? You are not your- usual, fabulous, cocky, rude to Jace, -self. What's wrong?"

He took a sip of his tea. It must have been nice, because he closed his eyes for a moment and sighed in content. "I'm just really, really tired."

And suddenly Isabelle remembered Magnus was 800 years old. "Anything I can do for you?"

Magnus shook his head, a few stray strands fell to his eyes – apparently he didn't have enough energy to arrange them into spikes. "I'll be fine, Isabelle, but thank you. I just need some time to recover, regain my strength and my magic. I'll be just fine."

Izzy sneaked her arm around his waist – she gave up an idea of throwing it around his shoulders, since he was so tall – and squeezed there. "I know you will. And how's my brother?"

Magnus eyes lit up with amusement. "Like I said, Alec was… difficult."

"You mean his libido doesn't let you sleep?" Isabelle questioned, giggling.

Magnus laughed at his – and Izzy felt relieved. She'd been really worried, but that sound of happiness eased her concern.

"What's so funny?" asked Jace, suddenly not so interested in Clary and Simon's chat – it had to consist too many mundane's references.

"Nothing, blondie. Listen, kids, I don't want to be rude," Magnus glanced at Izzy and she smiled encouragingly at him, "but get your asses out of here, please. I need my beauty sleep."

Jace snorted, and Simon rolled his eyes. The vampire muffled, "It means: I need some time alone to have my wicked way with Alexander."

Clary giggled and the golden boy high-fived with him. Well, it was rare – he'd won Jace's approval. By making fun of Magnus and Alec, which was not very noble, but whatever.

Isabelle, in turn, hit Simon's arm, and taking that she was a Shadowhunter, it must have been at least a little painful. She shooed them away, and left at the and. Before she closed the door, though, she threw one last glance at the living room: Magnus was trying to assume the most comfortable position possible next to Alec – and it must have been pretty difficult, since the Shadowhunter was now spread across the whole couch. So the warlock just snuggled against his boyfriend, and having kissed the top of the boy's head, he finally let himself close his eyes. Alec shifted in his sleep and mechanically accustomed to Magnus' body. They fit together perfectly.

She closed the door.

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><p><strong>Um, so. :)<strong>

**We've reached 50 reviews. Seriously, guys, I don't know how to thank you. You're amazing, all of you! :D I've never, ever thought I would get more than 1. So... THANK YOU! I love you all! :3  
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**Secondly, as you probably found out, we're heading to the end. We're after the main events, so there isn't much left to the plot. 2,3, maybe 4 chapters. V's trial (yup, we'll be there), maybe some lemons (^^ I promised you, didn't I?), some Gang-time. (The Gang means of course Malec, Izzy, Simon, Clary, Jace). I love writing pointless chapters: serene, fluffy, smutty (^^). Like, for example, breakfast in bed, steamy make-out session, sex, maybe hot shower scene... You know what I mean? xDD And now I need your help - do you want me to write a lemon for the next chapter? (Ah, and about MA materials. I'm not planning to move out from there, but if they by some miracle take down my stories, I'll let you know somehow where I am. (Livejurnal or sth). I'll not vanish :D). Because I'm stuck. I could get straight to the point, end action, and finito. I don't know if you're bored or you want me to stay a little longer ;D We could think something up, ya know? ^^ **

**Anyway, thanks for reading! :)**

**Love you! :3  
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	12. To Love Is To Treasure Scars

**A/N: Your wish is my command - so, here is a little (okay, maybe not so little :D) lemon for you ^^ (God, I'm nervous. Again..) **

**Disclaimer: CC owns them. (There are also few references to Cassie's short story 'Kissed' (first Malec kiss) in this chapter. I don't own it.) **

**Chapter 12: To Love is to Treasure Scars  
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**Song: My Love by Sia**

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><p>Somehow, when the evening came, they ended up in bed. Again.<p>

"It's been a long day." Magnus yawned. He was laying flatly on his back, staring at the ceiling. His torso was bare – he claimed it was more comfortable this way.

Alec, in turn, was looking at him. "You kidding? We've been doing nothing more than snuggling on the couch, watching silly TV shows, and eating."

Magnus smiled. He found Alec's hand and entwined their fingers. "I missed it."

Alec glanced at their palms – pale versus tan, complete opposites, and smiled, too. "Yeah."

At that moment, Chairman Meow climbed onto the bed. He settled on Alec's stomach, digging his claws into the Shadowhunter's T-shirt to nestle down. He purred pleasantly, when he found perfect position. Alec's smile grew wider at that. "Aw, I missed you, too, little one." He petted the cat behind his ear. Meow titled his head, leaning into his touch, and purring even lauder.

"You traitor."

Alec and Chairman looked at Magnus at the same time. The warlock's eyes were narrowed, and he was glaring at his tiny cat.

Alec laughed, and the little ball of fur bounced on his stomach in the rhythm of that sound.

Magnus continued, still deadly serious, "I can't believe it. You're choosing him over me? Really, Chairman? Really?" The warlock seemed truly offended. Alec couldn't help, but kept laughing. "When you first met him, I could see you liked him. I said, 'I never date anyone my cat doesn't like.' If only I had known…" Magnus trailed off mysteriously and shook his head.

Alec blushed at the memory. It was a day when he came to Magnus' apartment to thank him for saving his life. It was that day when… "Then what? You wouldn't have kissed me?" Alec asked, playful glow into his blue eyes. "Wouldn't have fallen in love with me?"

Magnus raised his gaze at the Shadowhunter before him. He slowly sat up, never breaking eye-contact, shooed Chairman Meow away (and closed the door behind him), and took the cat's place on Alec's lap. Now he was straddling him and Alec blushed furiously – it was very close to sexual position.

"I couldn't have helped it," Magnus said in low, raspy voice. Alec was already breathing heavily beneath him. "Even if I'd wanted." He was leaning over Alec, very, very slowly, so he was almost touching his forehead. He whispered against Alec's lips, "But I did want it. As I want it now." He finally lowered his head to brush his lips against Alec's, and at the same time Alec raised up from the pillow, too impatient to wait for Magnus' move. So instead of a gentle kiss, their mouths crashed against each other, in the bewildering tangle of lips, tongues, teeth, saliva and quick, shallow breaths.

When they finally pulled apart, Alec was already hard – and Magnus, who was still on top of him – could feel it perfectly. The warlock smiled wickedly and licked his lips. "Now, let me examine you."

Alec sighed – the sentence sounded suggestively, but he knew Magnus meant it literally - that insane warlock was crazy about Alec's health. So he let Magnus go off his lap, and he sat up, positioning himself opposite from his overprotective boyfriend. He pouted and raised his hands above his head – waiting for Magnus to take his shirt off for him – he definitely wasn't going to make it easy for the warlock.

But Magnus didn't respond for Alec's provocative behaviour – he was all professional. He took off Alec's shirt without caressing sensitive places, and totally ignored Alec's obvious goosebumps or hardened nipples. And his boner, too.

By the Angel, he was true torturer.

"Hmm." Magnus looked really engrossed in his job. "Even your deepest wounds are scars by now. They are a bit reddened, but they'll go pale within days. My magic is fabulous." He then reached for Alec's arm. "Show me how hot you are, babe," he chuckled to himself, but didn't look up at Alec to see his reaction. "OK, maybe it wasn't so funny. It definitely looks better. It's no longer so hot, too. A few more spells and you'll be fine." Next, he titled Alec's chin up with the back of his hand. He observed the wounded eye (he didn't need to remove the eye-patch, since Alec didn't bother to put it on after their bath and then the nap). "It's rather bloodshot. You might have overstrained it today. Tomorrow, we're back to the eye-patch, okay?"

"You finished?" Alec growled.

Magnus pecked him on the mouth. "Yup."

"Good." The Shadowhunter pushed his chest, not too gently, and Magnus collapsed onto the bed. "Now let _me _examine _you_." Alec grinned widely seeing the warlock so vulnerable next to him. Magnus' black strands spread across the turquoise pillow, and it looked fucking beautiful. He climbed on top of Magnus and leaned over him to whisper to his ear, "Draw the curtains, please."

The bedroom was already plunged into semi-darkness, but Alec needed more intimacy to do what he was about to do.

Magnus tried to point gaps between his boyfriend's logic, "But then, how are you –"

But Alec cut him off with a short kiss. "I don't need my eyes for that."

"Okay." Magnus surrendered quickly. He waved his wrist and the room went dark. Another move of his wrist, and single candle appeared on the bedside table, just to let them make out their faces. Magnus didn't need it – his eyes shone in the darkness – but he'd done it for Alec. And now Magnus saw him smiling.

"Thank you," Alec said quietly, brushing his lips and his words against Magnus' earlobe.

Then he kissed him – somewhat hesitantly at the beginning, and he didn't know where his uncertainty was coming from. He flickered his tongue, touching Magnus' lips and asking for permission to enter – it was given to him immediately. Now he was exploring that hot cavern of his lover, but soon, he stopped it.

He gasped for air and looked down at Magnus. The warlock's eyes were closed, and he was smiling lightly. Alec then leaned down and kissed Magnus' forehead – it was remarkably protective gesture. He passed his thumbs over Magnus' eyebrows, his eyelids, delighted in the feeling of Magnus' eyelashes brushing against his fingertips. He closed his own eyes to sharpen the rest of his senses. Then he found it – tiny, almost unnoticeable scar, somewhere between Magnus' right temple and Magnus' right eyebrow.

"_He _hit you here, didn't he?" Alec's voice was hoarse: lust and something… even deeper.

Magnus looked at him with half-closed eyes, but Alec's hand never left said place. Then Alec kissed it, like it was his most precious treasure. He whispered against Magnus' temple, "I hate it, because _he _put it here. But, at the same time, I love this scar, because it's a part of you." He kissed it again, brief kiss, and moved lower.

He followed random paths on Magnus' face: his high cheekbones, the shape of his ears (he put Magnus' hair behind them to expose that breathtaking picture even more), his nose, the curve of his mouth (those pink lips parted under his touch, and he had to use his all will to deny them).

He stopped at the chin. Another one. He kissed it. "So small, and yet, it shouldn't be here. Who dared put it here? You are far too precious. So beautiful. I love this scar, because it's a part of you."

He kissed it once again – wet, open-mouthed kiss, and moved lower.

He sucked on Magnus' neck, on his pulse point, and the warlock let out a low moan. It was his first sound since long time, as if he was afraid he would break some spell and Alec would stop. Because now, it was the boy who was a magician. His fingertips could create flames – but his flames weren't blue, like Magnus', they were fierce red, intoxicating with desire.

The warlock's chest was already bare, so nothing could stop Alec from fondling the caramel skin of Magnus' torso. He was peppering kisses across Magnus' collarbones, and from time to time his tongue flickered, touching all the right and the most sensitive spots. His path was now stained with purple hickeys – it was his own way of marking Magnus, of trying to wipe out the reminders of pain and V.

Alec stopped again at Magnus' right side, where he could feel the ribs under his fingers. He kissed the place. He spoke up, his hot breath tickling Magnus' bare skin, "Here, _he _wounded you again. No one, no one has the right to hurt you. No one." He licked it slowly, as if he wasn't sure if it was still causing pain or not. "I love this scar. Because it's a part of you."

He kissed it once again, and moved lower.

It became like poetry – Alec was an artist, and that was his poem. It comprised one, repeated refrain. It was filled with emotions, the poet put his heart and soul into it – and under his fingers, the work of art was being created.

He reached that part, where Magnus' tight, leather pants stopped him from continuing his path. Alec locked his eyes with his boyfriend's and started maneuvering with his clammy hands around the waistband of Magnus' pants. He unbuttoned them, and undone the zipper. Magnus lifted his hips to ease Alec's efforts, and his pants were soon removed. He was left with nothing more than his boxers, and he needed to get rid of them too. But it was Alec who was in charge tonight – and he decided to leave them on, for now.

The Shadowhunter trailed down kisses on Magnus' thigh, while massaging the other. He hooked his fingers under Magnus' knee and lifted it up a bit, arching his leg. There was Magnus' another weak spot, and when Alec licked it and sucked on it, the warlock groaned in pleasure. On the other side, there was another scar, too.

"I was looking into your eyes when _he_ threw that knife. I remember it as if I felt it too – the pain and everything, but the most detailed vision is your eyes. So full of pain and love at the same time, and it's almost unbelievable. But I see them every day – your eyes, they are always behind my eyelids." He kissed that place lovingly. "I love it, because it's yours."

Then he moved lower.

With his fingers, he followed curves of Magnus' calves, and stopped at his ankles. "And this one? Why haven't I noticed it earlier?" He looked up at Magnus. His eyes were closed, and he swallowed hardly – his Adam's apple bobbed up and down, and the action made Alec's own mouth go dry.

"My father." Nothing more left Magnus' mouth, but it was enough for Alec – the warlock was talking about his mother's husband, the man who wasn't his real father, and the man who had tried to drown him.

So Alec lowered his head and kissed the scar. "Don't you ever feel guilty about his death. I hate it, because he put it here. But at the same time, I love this scar, because it's a part of you."

And so, the poem was over. Perfect cycle, true masterpiece.

Alec leaned over Magnus and their lips finally met. The warlock sucked on Alec's tongue, and the boy hummed against his lips. Magnus almost ripped Alec's shirt off and the same happened to his pants and underwear. They managed to accomplish that almost without breaking the kiss. In some time, it became sloppy and messy, but they couldn't resist – it was as if the breathing of that other person was your own breathing, so you couldn't have stopped that exchange of air or you would have died. Paradoxically, your lover's breath became your oxygen.

Alec, still on top of Magnus, got rid of the warlock's boxers. They were skin-to-skin now, and when their erections met, they both moaned in unison. Then the Shadowhunter moved, so his face was in front of Magnus' crotch. He eyed the warlock's member hungrily, licked his lips, and finally, lowered his head. Swirling his tongue, scratching the length with his teeth – he knew he was driving Magnus crazy. But the warlock was surprisingly quiet tonight – usually he was screaming and swearing when Alec was deep-throating him, but somehow, that night was different. They were savouring it slowly, deliberately, almost with reverence. Alec looked up, without stopping his ministrations, and saw that Magnus was biting on his knuckles to stop himself from screaming. His other hand was fisted on the sheets. Usually, his fingers were tangled in Alec's strands, guiding the boy where he needed him the most, but now, if he had only put his hand on Alec's hair, he would have shoved him down and probably caused him to choke. Instead, he just whimpered, "Alexander…", and it was a warning that he was close.

Alec stopped – his lips left Magnus' member whit small pop sound, and he raised up to kiss his lover, allowing Magnus to taste himself on Alec's tongue. Then the Shadowhunter reached for the bottle of lube – fortunately it was in the drawer of their bedside table, so he didn't have to leave the bed.

Magnus had been sure that Alec was going to top – so his astonishment was endless, when Alec, after spreading some lube on his both palms, wrapped one of them around Magnus' cock. The other one went to Alec's own entrance – he slid two fingers in at once, simultaneously stroking Magnus – and started pleasuring himself.

Alec was masturbating in front of Magnus – and to Magnus, it was one of the hottest sight in the world. The boy opened his eyes and their gazes met. Small cry escaped Alec's mouth, "Oh, Magnus, I want you inside me…"

Alec stopped his previous motions, and wiped his palms on the sheets. He positioned himself over Magnus' penis, feeling as it teased his hole.

But a poem needs its message. He looked Magnus right into the eyes. "I love this dick, because it's not only huge, but it's a part of you."

Then Alec lowered himself – slowly, inch by inch, Magnus watched as his cock was swallowed by Alec's hot ass. When he was fully inside, he let out a long moan. Alec felt so good. He looked at the boy – his back was arched, his head threw back, his eyes half-closed, his lips formed in perfect "O". And then the boy moved – and paradise turned into heaven.

Magnus could do nothing more than lay completely still, as if he didn't want to disturb Alec in such act. The Shadowhunter was rolling his hips – up and down – using Magnus to pleasure himself, since the warlock could only stare at him in awe – it seemed he wasn't even blinking.

It was ridiculous simile, but in the dim light of that little flame, Alec reminded Magnus of a mermaid – the way he was moving fluidly as if he was swimming, dancing against water, everything in slow motion, his body glistening with sweat, his movements smooth and slow, so perfect. Small moans and shallow breaths were escaping his rosy lips. His head was threw back, exposing his neck – one single drop of sweat ran down the pale column, and it was what finally woke Magnus up – the irresistible urge to lick it from there. Magnus clutched at Alec's forearms and bucked his own lips, meeting his boyfriend's thrust.

And then Alec screamed – Magnus must have hit his prostate, so without changing the angle, the warlock started thrusting inside Alec, mimicking his slow pace, but with so much force that for a moment he was afraid the boy would rip apart. But for Alec, who was a Shadowhunter, it wasn't enough. So he leaned back, supporting himself on his hands and opening himself even more. Magnus thrusts became deeper, and after a few more, Alec came with a thrill and a cry.

The warlock, seeing his boyfriend so exposed and feeling him clenched around his dick, couldn't hold back any longer – he released inside of Alec, and his orgasm was so hard that his semen spilled off Alec and over his thighs.

The Shadowhunter got off him and collapsed onto the bed, his face into the pillows and his abused ass standing in the air. "By the Angel," he mumbled against the sheets.

Magnus rolled to his side and stared at his… sweaty, hot, sexy boyfriend. "That was amazing."

Alec turned his head to look at Magnus through his plastered-to-his-forehead hair. He blushed, seeing Magnus' satisfied facial expression. "Really?"

Magnus laughed. "Yes, really. Now you can agree with me that it was indeed a long day, and you are exhausted, hm?"

Alec just closed his eyes and nodded.

Magnus reached for his boyfriend's hand, which was resting near his cheek, and entwined their fingers – it was too hot for cuddling. Unbelievable, they had been laying in much the same position just – how long ago? Magnus had no idea if they were minutes, hours, days or eons. That simple gesture – holding hands – always meant the same. And it always felt like holding real treasure.

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><p><strong>I have a thing about sappy endings, I know xD. I can't help it. Okay, now, my lovely readers, tell me what you think! I hope you enjoyed it! :) <strong>

**Next chapter probably will be V.'s trial (at last!), but I'm still thinking about dividing it in two, 'cause it'll be rather... huge. I don't know, we'll see.  
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**Till next time! :)  
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	13. To Love Is To Destroy

**A/N: Hi! ^^ It's me again :D **

**Firstly, sorry for a huge amount of OCs in this chapter, but it was rather inevitable. I needed them to show V.'s methods for winning over his followers, and to follow (somehow) Alec's track of mind. Anyway, I tried to shorten their stories as much as I could, because I don't want you to be bored! ^^ So I hope you'll forgive me. *_* And remember, this fic is set before CoLS, so I had to... make up some characters...? Uh, nevermind xD.  
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**Disclaimer: Cassie owns TMI. There are also some references to _Harry Potter _in this chapter, and, no, I don't own it/him? (I don't know xxd). (big surprise here xd.)**

**Chapter 13: To Love is to Destroy  
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**Songs: _Heart-Shaped Box_ by Nirvana (the Downworlders' testimonies) and _After the Storm_ by Mumford & Sons (Alec's mind).  
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><p>It was six in the morning when Alec's cellphone started ringing. The Shadowhunter was already awake, so he stood up silently (careful not to wake Magnus), grabbed the device from the bedside table, and the pair of jeans from the floor. He left the bedroom and hit the receiver button.<p>

"Hello?" he said, quietly and rather breathlessly. He tried to put on his pants, while maneuvering his mobile between his shoulder and ear.

"Alexander?" It was Maryse. "Are you okay? Am I interrupting in… something?"

"No, Mum. Magnus's still sleeping."

"Oh. Good. How is he doing?"

Well, it was a shock. "Um, he's fine, thank you. He needs some time to fully recover, though." Before his phone started ringing, he'd been staring at Magnus – it was kind of creepy, watching someone sleep, but he did it anyway, almost every morning. He couldn't help it, he was an early riser, and Magnus – a lazy ass. So he'd woken up and looked at his boyfriend, hoping that last night maybe had taken away his physical energy, but given something much more vital – _strength_.

"I'm glad." There was a short pause. "Alexander, within an hour we're starting the trial."

"What?" Alec was confused. Why hadn't they said something earlier?

"I'll be honest – Clave wasn't sure if yours and Magnus' presence would be a good idea. But we finally agreed that you have a right to be there. Although, you're not obligated to come. It's your call."

"I want to be there."

He heard Maryse's sigh. Was she disappointed? "I thought so. We're starting with the questioning of Downworlders." And then she hung up. Just like that.

Alec looked up from his cellphone. The room suddenly felt too small and overwhelming. He started sweating. He hadn't expected that his confrontation with V. would be so soon and sudden… He took a deep breath, trying to ignore a big lump in his throat. He thought he could use a shower. Cold water always helped him calm down.

* * *

><p>When he stepped outside the bathroom, his hair still damp, an eye-patch already on his right eye; Magnus was just rolling on his other side. He was still sleeping, though not so serenely anymore. It seemed like he was looking for Alec in his dreams. The Shadowhunter smiled and came up to the bed. He shook Magnus' shoulder gently, and bent down to whisper to his ear, "Magnus, wake up."<p>

The warlock's eyes fluttered open. "Alec? What's going on? Why are you dressed?"

"Calm down," Alec reassured his boyfriend. He perched on the edge of the bed, and cupped Magnus' cheek. "I need to go to the Institute," he said, massaging Magnus' cheekbone with his thumb, right under his still grogged with sleep eye. "The trial is beginning."

Magnus looked at him, taken-aback. "Why didn't you wake me up earlier?"

Alec casted down his eyes, staring at his lap. "Because I've heard what you said that night," he said quietly.

Magnus' brow was furrowed. "You need to be more specific."

Alec glanced at the window. He obviously was averting Magnus' gaze. "'_If I saw any of them, I would kill them.'_"

"Ah." Magnus removed Alec's hand from his cheek and twined their fingers together. The boy apparently hadn't expected that, because he finally looked at Magnus. The warlock went on, "So those Downworlders will be there?"

Alec nodded. "I'm going to the questioning. The sentence will be pronounce after that, I assume." He trailed off, and looked at Magnus intently, as if he was considering something and trying to predict Magnus' reaction. He started to play with the warlock's fingers, probably to avert his eyes, again. "I would like you to be there with me. When…"

"Of course."

Alec looked up and saw his brave, beautiful boyfriend smiling the smallest of smiles. It was reassuring, it was supporting. It was all he needed. His fears maybe didn't disappear, but for sure they reduced to bearable sizes. He brushed his lips against Magnus'. "Okay."

Magnus wrapped one arm around Alec's neck, and that gesture belied his following words, "Go. See you later," he said, his words caressing Alec's lips, their foreheads touching.

* * *

><p>Isabelle was waiting for him on the Institute's steps. As soon as he turned up, she dragged him inside and started to lead in the direction of the Sanctuary. She seemed agitated.<p>

"Good to see you here, finally!" Izzy was speaking quickly, without slowing down. "It's all just so fucked up! Really, I feel like being trapped in one of those _Harry Potter _movies that Simon made me watch."

Alec looked at her, his gaze blank. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

She just rolled her eyes. "You'll see. And, please Alec, sit by me and Simon, okay?"

"Okay, but Izzy, slow down! Could you just tell me what's the matter?"

They stopped suddenly and Alec looked around. They were at the Sanctuary's door.

Isabelle turned to face him, and put her hands on his shoulders. "Don't freak out. One last thing: V.'s here."

What? He hadn't had enough time to even protest, when Isabelle opened the door and dragged him inside.

He hadn't expected what he saw.

The Sanctuary was completely changed – probably due to some help of friendly warlocks. Seats were arranged into a circle, and it looked like a Greek amphiteathre. The seats in the stand were packed with Nephilim – they were all in gears, ready to fight. Suddenly, Alec felt even more vulnerable. He hadn't brought any weapons, he didn't even have his stele! The new Consul was sitting the closest to this 'stage'. Maryse was next to him (as a host of the Institute), along with Jace and Clary (apparently, they were considered as personages, since they had directly fought against V.). Alec thought there was also a seat for him, but Izzy didn't lead him that way. He was walking after her, without paying attention to the people whom he passed by. They didn't look at him, either – having their eyes stuck to the middle of the hall. His gaze turned in that direction.

In front of Maryse, but not quite in the middle, there was a single wooden chair. It was empty, for now, but Alec guessed it was waiting for the Downworlders.

There was also a column, in the center of the Sanctuary.

It was where V. stayed. He was kneeling, with his hands tied behind his back, chained to that column. Alec was struck by this view – V. had changed during those few days: he'd lost weight, he looked older, he was so dirty that it was really hard to tell what he was wearing – anyway, Alec, who had saw him earlier, could guess it was still that white attire. He looked sick. Actually, he looked as if he'd been kept in Silent City, tortured and starved. For a brief moment, Alec thought he could see caked blood on V's shirt, stuck to the man's side. Though, he doubted that Clave would have went so far. But what was the most horrifying? The resemblance between that position and that one in which Magnus was once. The only difference was that, back then, V. was the torturer.

All of sudden, the man looked at him, as if he sensed Alec's presence, and the boy froze. Those eyes – deep violet, burning with rage. Even a scream wouldn't render it better. And even though the man was humiliated, his stringy hair was hanging around his face, Alec couldn't calm his frantic heartbeat, feeling uneasy.

"Come on, Alec." Izzy pulled his brother's sleeve, and the eye-contact was broken.

Alec climbed onto the bench and greeted Simon with a short nod. Isabelle's boyfriend was the only Downworlder here, at least for now. Then, Alec surveyed the entire hall – Izzy was right, it was fucked-up. Everything was somehow forced, theatrical, including the Shadowhunter's faces, seething with hatred. Alec huddled. Suddenly, he regretted coming here, but he couldn't leave now, trapped between Simon and Izzy. Besides, that one single chair was drawing his attention, so he watched.

The next Downworlder was brought into the Sanctuary (Alec assumed that somebody must have been there before that one, since he was late). It was a warlock – what gave him away was a squirrel tail and a pair of pointed squirrel ears, instead of human ones, on the top of his head (the latter wasn't so noticeable, since the boy was redhead). He came up to the chair shyly, and the two Nephilim who had led him in (as if he was a dangerous serial killer), sat him down.

The Consul spoke up, "Who are you?"

"I-I'm Gerald," the warlock's voice was quiet. "I was born in Ireland. I'm a young warlock, I've just stopped aging." And really, he was just a skinny boy, with freckles on his face, and blush on his nape.

The Consul seemed unmoved. "Confess your crimes, Downworlder."

The warlock's eyes widened. "My… crimes?"

"Why did you join V.?"

"I…" Gerald gulped. "He said he understood me. I just started to discover who I really am, and the Shadowhunters from Ireland Institute were helping me."

Alec thought about Magnus – little boy, being persecuted for who he was. How he must have felt lost, lonely, afraid…

"We were friends. I thought we were friends." Gerald blushed. "In fact, I had a crush on one of the girls. I believed, I was hoping…" The boy trailed off and swallowed his tears. He took a deep breath. "One day, she made a comment about my look. That my tail is funny and she can't imagine living with something like that." He didn't hold back his tears anymore. Salt drops were running down his cheeks shamelessly. "It was supposed to be harmless, innocent joke. It wasn't cruel, but nonetheless devastating. I ran away. V. found me, when I was about to cut off my tail. He said he'd been betrayed by Nephilim, too. I tried to explain him that it wasn't betrayal, not at all, but he convinced me – that Nephilim can't love. I joined him, because I had nothing. And later, I couldn't leave him anyway… I found sort of a family among them, the rest of Downworlders. Telling each other stories about broken heart can really bring people closer together… So, please, tell me, you aren't going to hurt them, are you?"

It was rather surprising ending of the story, and the Consul slammed his fist on the top of the desk in front of him. "It's not you who are asking questions. So, are you pleading guilty?"

"G-guilty? But I didn't do anything…"

"Warlock! Have you been plotting against the Shadowhunter race with V.?" Upon hearing Consul's solemn voice even Maryse flinched.

But Gerald raised his chin. His eyes shone with tears. "I believe that my only crime was love."

V. started laughing in the background, but he was quickly silenced.

The Consul looked like he was about to tear his hair out. He yelled, "Next!" and Gerald was led out.

Alec couldn't stop staring at the now-empty place. He couldn't stop thinking what he would do if somebody took his love away. _'After all, deprived of love – you aren't yourself.' _What he would do if he wasn't accepted for who he was… But the saddest part was that he somewhat understood Gerald…

He shook off when the next Downworlder was brought in. It was a vampire, who, unlike Gerald, was walking with self-confidence – or at least he looked like he didn't care at all. With arrogance, he refused to sit on the chair.

"Who are you?" the Consul spoke up in the same manner.

"It doesn't matter, Nephilim," the vampire hissed. "You are traitors and liars, and you considered yourself as gods. V. promised me two things: coming-out plus human blood. How could I refused? I wanted power. I still want it. And I'm not going to disavow it." He finished, with meaningful glance toward Maryse.

The Consul narrowed his eyes. "At least we know you are telling the truth. So you admit that V. acquainted you with his plan, and yet, you –"

The vampire cut him off, "Yes, I admit it. I've also heard about that stupid warlock, Bane. He's old, but so naïve. You're using him, even though you're disgusted by us, Downworlders. You are such hypocrites! But no, V. never concealed anything from us."

V. laughed again, and this time Alec understood the cause of it. Their master was never going to reward his pets. They were just the tools in his hands.

The vampire seemed disorientated. He turned around to look for the source of that scornful sound. His eyes widened when he saw V.

"Master…"

V. didn't stop laughing, until he choked and started to cough of blood. The Consul yelled, attracting attention back to himself. "Are you pleading guilty?"

The vampire spat. "Nephilim aren't going to judge me."

"NEXT!"

Alec found it harder and harder to focus. All he could think was Magnus…

A werewolf girl stepped into the Sanctuary. She was petite and pretty, but also seemed kind of… _Broken, _Alec thought.

She didn't sit down, too. She was standing as stiff as a poker, as if she was afraid she might break down in front of Shadowhunters.

"Nancy, beta wolf in California clan." She anticipated Consul's question. He just made a gesture with his hand, ordering her to continue. "I… fell in love with one of your kind. I joined V. because… I felt he understood me. But soon I realized that nobody understands such overwhelming pain and sense of guilt." She trailed off. One single tear escaped her eye. "My Shadowhunter boyfriend… he cheated on me. And I… broke up with him. But he didn't want to let me go… He claimed he'd love me… So one night, he was out to find me. He ventured into the neighbourhood where our clan lived, and it was dangerous area." The girl finally gave up, and slumped into the chair. "He was attacked by some demons. He died. Because of me. I destroyed him, he destroyed me… It turned out that my wolves-brothers knew about his coming, but they didn't help him. Why? Because they thought he deserved it. After breaking the heart of his pack master's right hand. So it was my fault. _I destroyed him. _A few my brothers, in a gesture of solidarity, joined V. with me."

Nancy didn't stop talking, but Alec couldn't hear her anymore. _To love is to destroy. Who would I be, if it wasn't for Magnus? _Most of those Downworlders didn't have any idea of V.'s plan. They were just a bunch of fools in love, whom V. used, having manipulated their emotions.

He couldn't breathe. Isabelle grabbed his elbow. "Alec? Are you okay?" He shook her hand off by standing up abruptly. He pushed his way through the crowd of Nephilim, who were now demanding the truth form the werewolf girl.

And amid that, he could have sworn, he heard V's laughter. Mocking him. Deriding him. Despising him.

_Does love really make you stronger? When it stops, it leaves you weaker than you were before. Maybe it's all just an illusion? What if without Magnus I'm just a skeleton, broken piece of meat, just an empty body, ready to give up everything that I found precious before? _

He stopped thinking.

It didn't really matter.

As soon as he left the Institute, he started running for dear life.

He had one more thing to do.

* * *

><p><strong>So I guess the drama isn't over yet, hmmm? *evil laugh* I just love angsty Alec :3<strong>

**Soo, nooooow. I don't like this chapter very much :/, but please, don't kill me! Tell my your thoughts anyway. And then, I will hurry up, and try to update quickly, okay?  
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**Part 2 of V.'s trial SOON! :D  
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	14. To Love Is To Be an Angel on Call

**A/N: Hm, first part - it might be not what you've expected. Some sudden events... Maybe I wanted to show that everybody has a piece of V. in themselves...? Interpret as you wish. Anyway, I hope you'll enjoy it! :)**

**Disclaimer: Cassie owns TMI and TID. I don't own _A Song of Ice and Fire _nor _The Hunger Games_ series.  
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**Chapter 14: To Love is to Be an Angel on Call  
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**Song: Guardian by Alanis Morissette (LYRICS! They're perfect.)**

* * *

><p><em>"If no one cares for you at all,<em>**  
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_Do you even really exist?"  
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_'Clockwork Prince' by Cassandra Clare  
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He was taking two steps at a time, in order to prove himself as fast as possible, that everything what was happening was true. That feeling when everything seems too beautiful too be real? Or, on the contrary, too dreadful, and you don't want it to be real? Yeah, it felt somehow like that – those two feelings, mixed together. He rushed into the apartment, and tried to catch his breath. Cold sweat ran down his spine, causing him to shiver violently. He brushed his hair off his forehead and followed after the sound of running shower.

He entered the bathroom. There he was – Magnus Bane. Looming out of clouds of steam, standing in front of an enormous mirror, in nothing more but a towel around his slim waist. Something, someone so stunningly beautiful couldn't be destructive, right?

"Hello, pirate! What are you doing here? I was going to set off to the Institute soon…" The warlock trailed off when he took a notice at Alec's state. "Alexander? What happened?"

He must have looked like some sort of a lunatic, and maybe he was. But all he could do was stutter, "I… I fucking love you."

Magnus arched one eyebrow. "Okay…? But what exactly are you doing –" He was cut off, when Alec pushed him for a kiss. It was desperate, it was rough, and soon Magnus' back hit the wall.

He bit on Magnus' lower lip and tasted blood. _Yes, it was definitely real._ Then he sucked on Magnus' neck – the warlock's hot breath against his temple was so teasing, he couldn't have imagined it, could he?

"Mmm, baby…" Magnus moaned, "you do realize we have to go to the Institute, right?"

Alec growled, tugging at the towel around Magnus hips. "I don't care. I need you. Now." He almost ripped the offending material, and it slipped to the floor. His movements were so firm, so demanding that Magnus didn't even have enough time – or will – to protest.

Alec lifted Magnus up, by wrapping the warlock's legs around his waist. With Magnus help, he managed to take his cock out of his pants, and in the process his jeans slipped down halfway his ass. He was still fully clothed, though, while Magnus – stark naked.

"Lube?" Alec asked, his voice raspy against Magnus' earlobe.

The warlock conjured it up, and palmed Alec's erection with it. Panting, he demanded, "Just fuck me already!"

Alec grabbed Magnus' hips, lifted him, leaving him hovering above his cock. And then he slammed him down, without preparation or even a warning.

"Fuck, Alec!" Magnus cried out.

The bathroom tiles were damp from steam after a shower, so Magnus was sliding easily against them. Alec was trusting almost violently: short, quick, hard movements of his loins.

All he could feel was the heat – surrounding his dick, shrouding him, devouring his intestines, his pounding heart. It felt like his heart had been torn away, crushed into bloody pulp, and then settled somewhere between the two. It was directly connected with Magnus' heart – he could feel easily Magnus' own heartbeat against his scarred skin. It was almost painful. _It has to be real. It is real. _So many, so strong emotions – you can't originate such feelings. It felt like he could burst in flames at any time. _It has to be real. _

"Alec, God!" Magnus' cry snapped him out of his psychedelic thoughts. "Not so, ah!, rough!"

He suddenly realized what he was doing. He withdrew immediately, leaving Magnus, who screamed again at the sudden feeling of emptiness.

"I'm sorry! Did I hurt you? I'm so sorry…"

Hu must have looked pathetic: standing in the middle of fogged bathroom, with his dick painfully hard, leaking with pre-cum. But it didn't matter – he practically raped his boyfriend!

"No. You didn't. Yet." Magnus looked at him intently. And in a moment, his face softened. "Come back here. Don't leave me."

Alec moved closer. That voice, soothing, calm, so familiar. _Yes, it was real. _

"Yes, just like that. Gently…"

He was back inside of Magnus.

"Aaaaah. Okay, you can start moving…"

And he did. But still, their love-making – earlier it was rather fucking – had such painful weight… (And not because Alec had to support Magnus against the wall). He put his forehead on Magnus' shoulder, and placed his hands on the wall, on the both sides of his boyfriend. His thrusts were shaky – his legs weren't giving up, so that wasn't the reason for it.

He felt like crying. What a pathetic human being – crying while having sex with the love of your life! And then Magnus hugged him – he didn't cling on him, didn't clench around him – Magnus lovingly embraced him.

And it was so intense, so sensual… The heat around him turned into pleasant warmth, which spilled onto his stomach. Soon, he climaxed, filling Magnus with his sperm.

_And that was real. _

He pulled out and let Magnus stand by himself, but didn't let go. His face was still hidden in the crook of the warlock's neck. He was crying – hoping that Magnus would take his hot tears for condensed steam from the tiles. Until a soft sob escaped his mouth, and he heard Magnus' whisper,

"Baby?"

_His concern was real. _

He unwrapped himself from Magnus, and instantly hid his face into his hands. "I'm sorry," he mumbled. "I hope I didn't hurt you."

"Alec."

He looked at Magnus through his fingers. He took a notice at his naked frame: many angry, purple bites covering his neck and torso (when had he done it?), drained cum on the insides of his thighs.

"You may probably want to clean yourself up," Alec said. "I'll go change. I'll talk to you later?" He left, without waiting for Magnus' answer.

_What he'd just done – it definitely was real._

* * *

><p>They met at the front door. Magnus surveyed Alec: the Shadowhunter was wearing a gear, the bow slung over his shoulder. His eyes were downcast, his cheeks still flushed from hot tears. They set off to the Institute in silence. Magnus was waiting for Alec to speak, but the boy kept his mouth shout stubbornly. They got in a taxi (they were already late, so what's the difference?). For a mundie, they must have looked like a couple of madmen – Alec armed like he was going to take part in archery competition; and Magnus – sprinkled with glitter from head to toe.<p>

Finally, Magnus spoke up, trying to sound casual, "Care to explain what was that about?"

Alec's head jerked up – he looked at Magnus, and almost instantly averted his eyes from the warlock, as if he'd forgotten himself for just a moment. "I… don't want to talk about it."

"Oh, no. I'm not going along with it. I'm your partner, Alexander. I have a right to know."

"I said I was sorry! What else do you want?"

"That's not it. You didn't hurt me, I'm just… worried. It was so out of character –"

"Me being a dominant?"

" – that I want to know what to do when it'll happen again."

"It won't happen again," Alec snapped back.

"You don't know it. Just tell me what was it caused by?"

"Nothing," Alec mumbled.

"Really? Is that why you were crying?" Magnus voice was raised. He knew he shouldn't get mad, but he couldn't help it.

"By the Angel, Magnus, just drop it, okay?" Alec shouted.

The driver glanced at them through a driving mirror.

They were silent again. Magnus heard a shaky breath coming from Alec's side of the car. He decided to try again – he took Alec's hand into his own, begging his emotions to stay calm.

"I guess the nightmare didn't go away, did it?"

Alec's palm clenched around Magnus' fingers. Then, quieter than the quietest whisper, "No. Not really."

Magnus sighed and pulled the boy to himself. He placed his chin on the top of Alec's head and said against the ink mop of hair, "Talk to me."

And Alec obeyed, his voice muffled by Magnus' shirt. "I saw _him _there, and I immediately remembered what he did to us. To you. What he did to you. Not that I ever forgot, but looking in those full of hatred eyes… And suddenly I wasn't sure what was real. Have we really escaped from there? I watched those Downworlders and I couldn't stop thinking, 'What if I am one of them?'. I couldn't shake off that feeling, how I'm very much alike them… How weak I am, how _I don't exist _without you. So imagine that feeling when I finally saw you…"

Magnus locked his lips with his boyfriend's. They tasted of salt. "It'll be over today, baby. And I'll be there. I'm sorry –"

"No! Don't you dare! It isn't your fault. It's me, my fucked up mind, my cowardice…"

"Alexander Gideon Lightwood. Just shut up."

Alec looked up at Magnus. Small, small smile danced across his lips, raising slightly the corners of his mouth. "Okay. I love you. And I'm sorry."

Magnus shook his head with eyes full of playful disbelief. But then, his face turned serious again. "We're here."

And indeed, they were in front of the Institute. They got off the taxi, Magnus paid for the drive. The car receded. The warlock offered his hand to Alec. "Time to face _our _demons, don't you think?"

Alec gulped and nodded.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: The mai****n scene was inspired by _The Mockingjay__ (The Hunger Games _trilogy) by Suzanne Collins. (****For those of you who read the books: I think that's pretty obvious which events were the inspiration. I don't want to give away the plot for those of you who only saw the movie.)**_  
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_"Can a man still be brave when he's afraid?_

_That's the only time a man can be brave."  
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_'A Song of Ice and Fire' by George R.R. Martin  
><em>

Shoulder to shoulder, they stepped into the Institute – Alec for a second time that day – and were instantly greeted by a crowd of angry Shadowhunters. Maryse was among them.

"Where on Angel have you been, Alexander?"

Alec stayed completely calm. Even Isabelle, who stood somewhere behind her mother's back, looked horrified. But not Alec.

"What do you mean, mother? Did you forget what you said? I was free not to come in a first place."

Maryse was furious. "Yes, but then I saw you in the Sanctuary. We've already made plans."

"We?" Alec arched his eyebrows. "Once again, what do you mean by that?"

At that moment, the Consul decided to step in. "Alexander Gideon Lightwood. On the strength of the right granted us by the Angel, Clave condemned V. to death. You are the one who is going to execute the sentence."

Alec blinked once. The only sign of his astonishment was a hard squeeze on Magnus' hand. Angel, he was now grateful to his boyfriend for standing at his side.

"What are you expecting me to do?" Alec finally said, and Maryse let out a long breath that she wasn't even aware she was holding.

They started walking in the direction of the Sanctuary – Alec deep in conversation with the Consul, all the time holding Magnus' hand. The impatient crowd followed them, clearly ignoring the warlock's presence.

"It's good you have your bow with you, Alexander," the Consul went on. "One of your arrows is going to take V.'s life."

Alec just nodded shortly.

They entered the Sanctuary. V. was where Alec had last seen him. Because the hall was half empty, his huddled form was even more conspicuous. Upon seeing the Shadowhunters, he managed to stand up.

Alec stopped opposite V, in sufficient distance. Magnus stood by him. Nephilim once again started filling the stands, hungry for a show, as if watching a death of one of them was exciting.

V. narrowed his eyes at the couple. "I can't believe it!" he spoke up loudly. The hall instantly went quiet. Everybody's eyes were on the three. "You were fucking just before my death! That's why you are late! And I am the cruel one?"

Murmur of disapprobation went through Nephilim, and it wasn't because V. dared to speak, cynicism mixed with true incredulity. No. They just pretended that they didn't see Alec and Magnus' relationship, that said relationship didn't even exist. But when it was thrown right at their faces, they decided to show their disapproval. They were riddled with conservatism and homophobia. One of them was in love with a Downworlder. One of them was in love with a man.

Alex shook his head. "Your last words, V.?"

Magnus stood steadily beside him. He didn't comment on Alec's acts.

"You aren't going to do it, kid. I know it, you know it. You are too… good. I would say: too weak, but –"

Alec raised his chin and reached into the quiver.

"Come on! I've made you a cripple. Now, you wouldn't even hit the target. Tell him, Maryse!" V. was now addressing Alec's mother, but didn't take his eyes off the teen. "You are good at lying, Maryse, tell him he isn't going to do it!"

The boy put an arrow on a bowstring. "This is your last chance."

V's face scrunched up in fury. "Stop him, _Magnus_!" he shouted. "You stupid warlock, I wanted to help you!" He was struggling at his ties now. "He's your boy-toy, just fucking tell him to stop!"

Alec looked at Magnus. The warlock returned his gaze, but it held nothing. His face was blank, expressionless. However, Alec seemed to read something in it, because he nodded slightly.

He never lowered the bow. Normally, his hand would have started shaking by now, and his arm gone numb, but today – he was holding his weapon confidently.

V. was constantly wailing now. "You are dead! You were all dead, long before I came into a view! You stupidly believe in love –"

Alec whispered, rather to himself, chafing his cheek against coarse bowstring in the process, "'In their last moments, people show you who they really are.'"

And he shot the arrow.

_They say you see your whole life in the moment of your death, flashing before your eyes. Good times, bad times. But what happens when you are about to murder someone? When you are looking in the eyes of a man whose life is in your hands? You are standing in front of him, and you must make one decision – let him live or kill. Usually, you don't have a choice. _

_ Well then, Alec remembered all happy moments spent with Magnus. Moments, which had made him better Shadowhunter. Better man. Made him, _him:

_ Magnus, saying, "Call me."_

_ Magnus, seating by his bed, after saving his life. The light of dawn playing on his face._

_ Their first kiss._

_ Magnus, confessing his love, on the streets of attacked Alicante. Right after he had called him an idiot. _

_ Magnus at the Accords Hall. In the day of Alec's coming-out. _

_ That night when they made love for a first time._

_ Magnus, saying he loves him. Every day. His green-golden eyes, smiling at him. _

_ Those pictures caused him to take that one decision. Because of them, his hand didn't even tremble. _

The arrow cut across the air with a whistle and…

…it stuck into a wood right above V.'s head.

The man burst out laughing. He was in fact laughing so hard that he started choking. The dark stain on his side, which Alec thought he'd seen earlier, became darker. He sank to his knees. He couldn't catch his breath. A dribble of blood trickled down his chin. No more sounds escaped his throat. His head dropped onto his chest. He was dead.

It was only then when Alec lowered his bow. He'd made a right decision. Because he, unlike some people, had a choice. And he didn't let V. – even if he was seemingly defeated – in final blow take possession of Alec's free will.

Because love didn't make you a different person.

And Alec didn't forget who he was.

He felt his fingers became numb, and his weapon hit the floor with a thump.

The emptiness in his arms became instantly replaced by a warm flesh. Magnus closed Alec in his embrace and whispered to his ear, "I'm so proud of you."

Sweet scent of his boyfriend made Alec feel cut off from the outside world. He didn't hear as a racket erupted in the hall, as half of the Shadowhunters called him a coward, while the rest of them started to applaud. He forgot himself in everything that was Magnus. He finally let himself breathe in relief, he felt that a huge weight had been lifted from his shoulders. He knew it was, in part, Magnus' credit. His Guardian.

And he found the answer to his question – love made him stronger.

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><p><strong>You know, I wrote it, and then remembered CoLS. *cries in the darkest corner of a room*<br>**

**I guess that's it. THERE IS ONLY ONE CHAPTER LEFT! It'll be kind of epilogue. So, well... It's nearly time to say goodbye ;( I think I'm gonna cry. But not yet! :D **

**Btw, does anybody notice what was V's last word? Ha, irony!  
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**Thank you soooo much for reading and voicing your opinions! :) Review if you liked :) Or if you didn't like :D Anyway, feedback is always welcome!  
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**Love you all! xo  
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	15. Epilogue: To Love Is To Hope

**A/N: Sorry it took so long to update, but life has been a bitch recently... I've been busy, and I literally haven't had time to write. Anyway, I doubt you want to listen to it right now. **_  
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**After a line-break, there is a short smut, requested by Mo :) I didn't intend to write it in a first place, because, let's face it, it is not the main 'message' of this story, but who am I to deny my readers? ^^ So, if you don't want to read it, you can just skip it, it's not that important. (Mo, I hope it satisfies you ^^)  
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**(Ah, and sorry for the randomness, but when I was a kid, I always wanted my teeth to be in the shape of Tic-Tacs xD).  
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**A good-bye note at the bottom!  
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**Disclaimer: The usual. I don't own TMI.  
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**Epilogue: To Love is to Hope  
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**Song: All This and Heaven Too by Florence and the Machine**

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><p><em>Three weeks later <em>

Alec went into hot water. This time he chose a bathtub instead of a shower, because he had a feeling that his sore legs wouldn't have coped with this task. And he would have to stand under hot steam of a shower for a very long time, in order to relax his tensed muscles and clean himself of the demon ichor after a hunt. Even though he'd resumed his usual training two weeks ago, together with Isabelle, it was difficult to get back in shape. His muscles had disaccustomed from physical effort, he had to work on his reflex anew. Fresh applied runes were disappearing faster – they were faster wearing out. Only a short time ago he was allowed to finally remove an eye-patch. Anyway, he was already tired of Magnus' 'compliments' – that Alec is the sexiest pirate, of course after Jack Sparrow.

All of that brought more wounds than before. Of course, usually they were just small scratches and cuts – nothing what _Iratze _couldn't manage to heal; but they were also a reminder that everything had gotten back to normal. And it was nice. Well, maybe he was a bit of masochist. He had to have some masochistic inclinations, since he was dating the High Warlock of Brooklyn.

Magnus. It was for sure his credit that Alec had given up a shower, especially after that last sponge bath. Alec smiled at the memory. He lifted up his arm and watched as water flowed down his skin. Apparently a drop never chooses the same path… He almost hummed. It was… nice. Of course he would like Magnus to sit behind him, Magnus' strong arms wrapped around his frame. But it had changed, too. Magnus had stopped coming with them to hunts, he'd stopped with his insane overprotectiveness. Perhaps, after recent events, it would have been more natural if he'd doubled his guards, but yeah, they weren't normal. Probably he thought that now, that they had survived _this, _they would survive anything. They had strength. Besides, shadowhunting was Alec's job. The job he loved, and was good at. Magnus had finally grasped that. Anyway, he was the High Warlock, he had his duties – and he always examined Alec as soon as the Shadowhunter arrived at his doorstep. And this time, the boy didn't mind it, since usually it ended with Alec being naked, and that, in turn, led to mind-blowing sex session. Yes, usually, he really, really didn't mind it.

Those thoughts made him feel rather… excited. He almost wanted to laugh. It was ridiculous, that after so long, Magnus still had such effect on him. Alec took a deep breath and plunged his head into the water, hoping that the shock would help him get rid of his… not-so-little problem. He could easily hear his heartbeat under the water. It was racing.

_Magnus. Magnus. Magnus. _

Tu-dum. Tu-dum. Tu-dum_. _

_ Hush, Alec! Relax. __Slower... _Tuu-duuumm. Tuu-duuumm.

_Magnus! Magnus! _Tu-dum! Tu-dum!

He bobbed up abruptly, spraying water all over the bathroom. He was grinning, though. Yes, it was ridiculous, truly, that he still reacted like teenage girl.

With his hand wet, he reached for his cellphone.

_How's your day? _He texted, and after finding Magnus' name (with ridiculous heart near it, which he still wasn't sure whether it was Izzy or Magnus himself who had put it there), he hit 'send'.

The reply came immediately. _**Just finished work for today. Is everything alright? **_

Alec of course knew what Magnus was asking about. Fresh wounds. _Yup, we're fine. Just few scratches, the usual ;) What are you doing? _

_**Being lazy. Missing you :( You?**_

_Bath :)_

Silent. And then: _**Are you… naked? o_O Naughty… **_

Alec snorted and made a face, even if Magnus couldn't see it. _Haha, very funny, Bane. I'm finishing, in fact. _

And indeed, Alec stood up and started drying himself with a towel.

_**You are naked and… wet? Could you take a picture and send it to me? *_***_

_xD_

_**Please? **_

At that time, Alec managed to get dressed. Barefoot, with his hair damp, he headed through the corridors for the kitchen. _I was going to ask it earlier, but you distracted me ;) Wanna go to Taki's with us? Everybody's going._

_**Sure :) Meet you there in… 30 minutes?**_

_Okay :) See ya._

_**Love ya :* **_

Alec entered the kitchen, goofy smile plastered on his face, his cellphone sill in his hand.

"Hi, Alec!" Clary greeted him. She was sitting on Jace's lap, who was playing with her hair.

Izzy looked up from her own cellphone – she was probably texting Simon. "You ready?" Everybody nodded.

They left the Institute and met Simon at the corner of the street. Clary greeted him with a kiss on a cheek, and then Isabelle took him over. Clary felt Jace tensed up. Oh well, finally that V's case had finished, Alec and Jace could get back to being overprotective older brothers. It was just as well that Iz and Simon reduced to holding hands, limiting PDA to minimum.

They entered Taki's together, and took their seats – Clary squeezed between Izzy and Jace, Simon across from his girlfriend, and Alec near him. Oh, she didn't want to know what they were doing under the table. Izzy and Simon, of course. Not Alec and Simon. Gross. She smiled to her own thoughts, and Alec sent her a questioning look – they were sitting opposite each other now. She just shrugged.

At that time, a waitress came up to them – fortunately it wasn't Kaelie, because in that case Clary would have exploded with jealousy.

"Hi, what can I get you?" she asked, throwing Jace a dazzling smile. Her teeth were in the shape of Tic-Tacs.

They ordered their food – Clary chose her favourite pancakes, which she'd eaten when she'd been here for a first time, as if in another life. When they waited for their orders to arrive, Alec returned to constantly gazing at the front door. Obviously, he couldn't wait for Magnus. Finally, the warlock showed up – at the same time with their food. Alec visibly brightened up. It was fascinating – watching as his eyes changed colour: from deep navy blue to almost baby blue, like the sky lightened up by million suns. Clary already had tried to capture that in her drawings, once, but failed.

"Hey, there's Magnus!" Alec called cheerily, and waved at his boyfriend.

"Yeah, we can see him. It's not that he's hard to miss or something." Jace of course had to say something like that. Alec blushed and slumped his shoulders. Clary jabbed Jace in the ribs with her elbow. She did a mental note, to talk to him about it later – he really should stop with making Alec miserable. Why did he do it, anyway? They loved each other, it was obvious.

Meanwhile, Magnus came up to the table, and said simply, "Hello." Then he slipped to the seat next to Alec. He leaned towards his boyfriend, but the boy at the last moment turned his head, so Magnus' mouth met Alec's cheek, instead of his lips. It was almost as if Alec was afraid that he would piss off Jace even more.

Jesus, boys and their problems with showing their affections.

Isabelle spoke up, "So, Magnus, how are you doing?" She fixed her eyes on him, and took a sip from her dietetic shake.

Magnus raised his brows, but smiled anyway. "Magnificent as always, my dear Isabelle."

She smiled back at him. Alec casually took Magnus' hand, which was on his knee, and started playing with his fingers.

Jace glanced at their entwined palms, and then turned to Simon. "Enjoying your AB Rh- ?"

"Actually, it's B Rh+ . Just like Izzy's. It's the best." Simon grinned at Jace's disgusted facial expression. He didn't forget to show his fangs. Alec moved away a bit, pushing himself into Magnus' side (the warlock used that opportunity to sneak his arm around Alec's shoulders), but Izzy just laughed silvery. The two resumed their chat on rather normal subject, and Jace started to listen to them with curiosity – recently he was strangely interested in mundane things. He'd already started to spend too much time with Simon and Jordan – playing video games, and yet, still grumbling about their idiocy. Clary couldn't focus on their conversation, instead of that, she was discreetly observing Alec and Magnus. It was as if they were plunged into their own world. Magnus was quietly speaking something to Alec, and the boy literally was drinking the words from the warlock's lips – they were sitting so close to each other. It was amazing, how they affected each other: Alec instantly became more confident, he almost glowed with happiness. But it wasn't only one-sided effect: when Magnus was around Alec, he watched the boy's reactions with concentration and fascination; he searched on Alec's face signs of joy – it was the best if it was Magnus who was the source of said joy. Clary was dying to draw it, her fingers started to tingle, in anticipation of a pencil. The light of afternoon was playing in Magnus' now amber eyes, and Clary could swear that if she had looked closer, she would have seen the reflection of Alec's flushed face in them. Perfect picture of love. Yeah, Clary was a total sucker for romantic stories.

But the most surprising thing was that now Alec reminded Clary of herself, so much. Both of them, before they had found their true loves, had been lost. Either they had not wanted to admit who they were, or they just hadn't known it yet. She couldn't know it, but when she was around Jace, she was glowing in his golden light, too. Earlier, she had never imagined that she would be like Alec. But now… now she felt warmth around her heart every time she thought of that shy, black-haired boy. He was practically her brother, some day he would be her brother-in-law. _Oh, hush, Clary, _the girl told herself off. _What are you thinking about. For God's sake, you're sixteen! _She shrugged. _What the hell! _And because Alec was Jace's parabatai, she sensed it even deeper. How many stories had she heard about him, how many times had she heard Jace's whines, when he'd thought Alec was angry with him! Of course she realized that she would never be such sister, as Isabelle was to Alec. They would never be so close, but she could already feel that they were a family.

She sighed an turned away her head, when Alec and Magnus started kissing – lips barely brushing against each other, feather-like touches, but it was non less intimate and just _theirs. _

She then looked at Simon and Izzy. She was happy for them, too. Of course, at the beginning, she hadn't been so sure if it was such a marvelous idea – Izzy was going to take a walk in seven-inches heels through Simon's crushed heart, right? But now, Simon was genuinely happy. And Isabelle… She needed him, even if she didn't want to admit it. Clary just knew it.

"Fray?" Simon's voice snapped her out of her thoughts. "You are staring at me. It's kind of creepy, since your boyfriend it's just right here."

Jace narrowed his eyes at Simon, but Clary only snorted. "Sorry. I didn't intend to daydream. It's just… sort of… happened," she mumbled sheepishly.

Jace bent over her, and whispered to her ear, so she was the only one who could hear it, "You don't have to daydream, Clary. Just ask, and it's yours."

His hot breath caressed her neck, in tandem with his fingers on her thigh. She shivered. "Guys? Are you finished?" she spoke up before she could even think was she was doing. She added quickly, "We should probably go back to the Institute…"

Magnus smirked knowingly. "Someone's eager, hmm?" he said melodiously.

Alec threw him a glance, and then his hand disappeared somewhere, and after a second Magnus yelped. Then the blue-eyed boy leaned over Magnus and whispered something to the warlock's ear. Magnus stood up abruptly. "Okay. We're going. See you around?"

Isabelle and Simon just looked at each other and burst out laughing.

They left Taki's together, giggling, nudging and stumbling.

Love was like a glamour around them: surrounding them, sticking to them, making the air tremble with old magic. Love was making them shine – it was as if Clary was discovering her Sight again, that moment between seeing enchanted thing, and suddenly – its true countenance.

New. Sometimes mysterious. Secret. Astonishing. Always breathtaking.

Everything was back to normal. Of course in so normal as it was possible – when being a Shadowhunter, dating a vampire or a warlock. But there is nothing wrong with not-normal. Look at their love: diversity and… beauty.

And they could only hope that it would stay this way forever.

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><p>On the way to Brooklyn, they could barely keep their hand off of each other. At one moment, the taxi driver cleared his throat rather loudly, probably feeling uncomfortable with the heavy make-out session taking place on a back seat of his car. In response, Magnus snapped his fingers impatiently, without breaking away from Alec, and in a second they were inside of the apartment.<p>

Alec gasped. "We are going to be in _so much _trouble!"

Magnus laughed, like an impish elf he was, and Alec couldn't help but smirked, too. Doing bad things was… nice.

The warlock, having controlled himself, responded, "Nah. I cast a spell on him, he won't remember anything. Anyway, it's all your fault, Nephilim."

Alec put on an innocent face. "My fault?"

"You shouldn't have said such dirty things in the middle of a crowded restaurant, in public."

Mischievous expression appeared on Alec's face. "Mmm, that doesn't mean it wasn't the truth, though."

Magnus started to move closer to Alec, like a hunter tracking his victim. "And that doesn't mean it didn't turn me on." Finally, he attacked. Their lips crashed together, and after a minute, Alec was a writhing mess, trapped between Magnus and a wall of the living room.

"Off," the Shadowhunter breathed-out, tugging at Magnus' clothing – shirt, pants, whatever, he needed them to be gone.

Magnus just snapped his fingers, again, and then they were grinding against each other, skin-to-skin. When Alec moaned, incredibly loudly, Magnus stopped planting kisses on the Shadowhunter's torso. "At such pace we won't make it to the bedroom."

In response, Alec pulled Magnus down. They landed on the floor, a tangle of arms, legs, tongues. "Take me on the carpet," Alec whispered into hot skin of Magnus' neck.

The warlock murmured, "Gladly." He summoned a bottle of lube. That time it was rushed, heated, desperate. But no, Alec had to be punished. So instead of inserting his wet fingers into Alec's entrance, Magnus caressed the boy's nipples. The lube was cherry-flavoured, so next, he licked them clean with pleasure.

Alec groaned and bucked his hips, trying to create some friction. "More," he pleaded breathlessly.

Magnus' fingers travelled down, but still, he refused to enter the boy.

Alec mewled like a helpless, little kitten. "Stop teasing."

"Beg."

The Shadowhunter's eyes snapped open. He was… furious. For a one, short moment, Magnus thought that Alec would pushed him off, get up and leave. But then, Alec's face changed into the expression of… pure evil. And indeed, he pushed Magnus off himself. The warlock, completely surprised, sat on his heels.

Alec locked his eyes with his boyfriend's. Slowly, he lifted his hand to his mouth, and sucked on his index finger. Oh, he was going to show Magnus that the power of High Warlock of Brooklyn was limited. Magnus' eyes darkened, he gulped. Then Alec, reassured by Magnus' reaction, closed his own eyes – maybe he was too embarrassed to do what he was going to do next, to hold Magnus' gaze. He curled his fingers around his own member and gasped in relief. Mmm, it felt so good when he imagined it was Magnus' hand which was stroking him slowly, painfully slowly… He lost himself in pleasure and soon, he started moaning shamelessly. And when he almost gave up hope that his plan would work, Magnus grabbed both of his hands and pinned them to the floor above his head. The warlock looked down at him, insane with desire. "You are unbelievable."

Alec smiled, surprisingly soft smile.

Enough! Magnus threw Alec's legs over his shoulders, and after quick preparations, he finally shoved his dick into that hot ass. Their screams mixed together.

"Move!"

Magnus was pounding into Alec mercilessly, grateful to his boyfriend for his flexibility. The boy cried out when Magnus once again hit his sweet spot, and he clung on Magnus' forearms. The warlock looked down at Alec's flushed face. His eyelids were clenched together, his brows knit, he was biting his lip, a dribble of blood ran down his chin. Magnus licked it clean and whispered into Alec's ear. "Look at me."

And the boy complied.

Feeling Magnus all around him, without seeing him, was like knowing that the sky was blue above his head, without need to check it. It had many shades, of course – just like Magnus. Sometimes, it seemed pitch black, navy or purple; baby blue or even pink. It was undeniable, certain feeling. But to finally look into those beautiful, golden-green eyes… Incomparable. The same sky, only during a dawn. Forecast of something extraordinary, all shades connected together, kaleidoscope of colours and feelings.

Alec reached his climax, looking at this face. And it would have been awkward, if it hadn't been so… amazingly intimate.

Few blue sparks escaped Magnus' fingers when he released inside of Alec. The High Warlock of Brooklyn lost his control, again. He rode out his orgasm, with one whisper on his lips, "Alexander…"

And then they were lying motionless, Magnus still buried deep inside the Shadowhunter's body, aware of the magic they had experienced.

And it happened every time.

And then, again, they could only hope that it would stay this way forever.

_The End_

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><p><strong>I don't know if you noticed, but it kind of ends in a cycle. Everything is back to normal, yeah. And Florence sings, again! ^^ <strong>

**I have no idea what to say. It's over. Thank you so much for reading** **this story, for sticking with me. It's been an amazing experience, at least to me. Your kind words, your reviews and messages always helped me get through hard moments, and not only in the plot, but in my real life as well :) You all are fabulous! :3 I love you. **_  
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**What now? Hmm... I had another dream xD. But really, I'm not sure if I can become involved in new story, because soon (okay, not so soon, but, still...) my life is going to get bitchy, again. I don't want to start something new, and then leave it and update once a year. Or something. I guess we will see... (Belle, I really, really need to stop with this philosophy xxD).**

**Ah, I know! I said I hadn't had time to write? The truth is, my subconsiousness didn't want me to end it. ;( But it's time.  
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**Thank you, once again! I hope you enjoyed it! *heart*  
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